ads

Me? I'd smuggle crab legs.

Yeah, usually a couple slices of pizza....the popcorn they serve at my theater isn't filling, even if you go Large

large popcorn + large drink = $5.

How fucking cheap are you faggots?

I'm not an uncultured americunt swine so I don't eat while watching motion pictures.

>>30672328
And even if you do manage to eat a decent amount, you get horrible assbusting shits soon afterwards?

My qt3.14 scottish bitch smuggled a convenience store sammich from Boots or some shit in... it was the first time i'd ever experienced foodsmugglin and it made me love her very very much.
Since then I've only ever smuggled in pints of liquor.

>>30672356
Where do you come from? A large popcorn and a large drink is about 12-14 bucks around where I'm at.

>>30672356
Do you live in bumfuck? Around here a large soda at a theater will cost you at least $5.50

Nothing as messy as a burger, but I have smuggled booze and pot brownies in before.

I only smuggle alcohol in the theater. When I have a designated driver, of course.

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I've been bringing a backpack full of tall cans of beer into every movie I've seen over the last 2 years. Beer in theaters is the greatest

>>30672328

ofcourse the popcorn isnt filling.. you're a big guy..

I'm not a faggot who carries around a fucking backpack so I can bring some food into a theater.

>>30672356
Where do you live? That's cheap as hell compared to our $7.50 large popcorn and $5.00 large drink.

>>30672406
How do you get cans past the metal detectors?

Can't you fat fucks go for two hours without eating? For fucks sake.

Burgers, Ice Cream--anything and everything under the sun. Buy it, dump it in a backpack, take in, eat, dispose of. No one is the wiser.

>>30672406
Don't people notice the sound of when you pop one open?

>>30672424
>$7.50 large popcorn and $5.00 large drink.
where the fuck do YOU live

I live in Idaho

>>30672407
For you

>used to work at a movie theater
>usher shift
>guy walks in theater with little styrofoam box
>looks at me
>turns around
>is clearly stuffing it into his pants
>walks up to me, hands me his ticket
>brown spot near pocket area that is getting bigger
>smells like teriyaki sauce fucking everywhere

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>>30672433
>Living in Nazi occupied France

>>30672433
Metal detectors????
Are you watching movies in prisons or courthouses?

>>30672454
I live in Cali. Those aren't actual prices though but both of those together would cost at least more than $10.

>>30672433
>metal detectors
Haven't been to the movies in a while. They really did this shit since the whole Batman fiasco?

>>30672454
You're the weird one here. In most places in the US food at movie theaters is expensive as fuck.

One of the theaters in my city checks bags.

>>30672435

how do you use a backpack without them searching it? I even tried to bring in some candy once but they patted me down

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>Not getting your GF to smuggle a plethora of sweets, chewy shit and chocolate in her giant handbag.

Beta general

>>30672433
>metal detectors
reall? jesus christ

>>30672497
land of the free

>>30672497
Can't you call bullshit on that? How can that possibly be policy? All you need is a heavyset black woman to make a fuss to shut that shit down.

>>30672406
But all cinemas near me sell wine and beer at a reasonable price, and you can bring your glass into the picture. What uncivilized place do you live?

No, I try to avoid going at meal times, and movies are not extremely long so its not as though a few hours without food is going to kill me.
I can see why people would sneak in food though, that shit in the foyer is hideously overpriced.

We used to bring in candy from stores and stuff into the theaters when I was a kid. The candy at theaters is expensive as fuck.

>>30672504
>>30672497

>Allowing people that work at a cinema to search you

Jesus christ, that's complete and utter failure

>>30672497
That sucks.

I love sneaking food into theaters. I'll almost always do it.

Burritos are probably one of the best for smuggling, and sushi is a treat but kinda distracting to eat while the movie is playing.

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>>30672446
simply cough loudly when you open it. distraction tactics nigga. the most I've ever gotten was a slightly jealous look, like "why didn't I think of that?"

>>30672302
that's not food, that's a heart attack waiting to happen...
also yeah of course, i smuggle food into the theatre all the time, decent sized nachos with half a litre of coke cost like 10 euros in german cinemas, like i'm that rich...

>>30672433
>America

>be early 2001
>stop by KFC first, get a bucket of chicken
>go to grocery store
>get some ben and jerry's
>go to see fast and furious
>enjoy a great movie and fine dining.

>>30672532


yeah, well you would too if they were armed with tazers

>>30672356


Where the fuck do you live? Here it's $5 just for the fucking bottled water

>>30672528
Oakland mothafucka. Though I have been to a theater at my hometown where you could get a glass of wine and a cheeseplate for the theater. That was classy as fuck

I don't trust my intestines so i fast before i ever go to the cinema as i don't want to miss a thing

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Im surprised you americunts get to see any of the movie as you chomp your way through a five course meal.

>>30672532
>>30672532
>>30672532
>>30672532
>>30672532

Seriously this. If you allow disgusting cinema employs PAT YOU DOWN (LOL) or fucking SEARCH YOU, just jesus, consider suicide

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>the year of our lord 2013 anno domini

>not going to arthouse theate to get wine and crab legs with your movie

>>30672507
That? That is the fucking tops.

>>30672504
I live in Los Angeles. I can go way out to Beverly Hills and Century City and I still won't get checked. California is lax as fuck with it's supposed security. Only thing is they've began to check theaters and ask people for tickets and shit. Never happened to me, though.

>>30672465
>>Living in Nazi occupied France
the joke is that he's american because american is the most retarded country when it comes to personal freedom and security
meanwhile in french theaters they can bring whatever they want and even has sex probably

>>30672356
large soda is like 10 dollars alone

>>30672520
Well, I've personally never went to that theater again. It's a little out of my way but a friend wanted to go to it.

A lady was getting her purse checked ahead of me.

>>30672542
My nigga. Mexican food and burgers are god-tier smuggling.

I've actually been to a theater that serves crab legs

Have you ever sneaked into another movie after watching a movie you paid for? W-what if they catch you?

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Me and a couple friends once took one of those pre-cooked chickens into a movie and ate it.

>>30672606
The trick is to eat it during the preview trailers. If you wait for the actual movie to start you run the risk of that shit going from hot to lukewarm. Cunty air conditioned theaters.

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>>30672520
>All you need is a heavyset black woman to make a fuss to shut that shit down.

ok I laughed

>>30672607
>not taking human contact whenever you can get it

ITT

the reason why I stopped going to the cinema.

inconsiderate cunt central.

What shitholes do you people live in that you don't have theaters that sell food and alcohol? I feel bad for you.

>>30672705
All theaters around me sell food, some sell booze. But its always steep as fuck

I once went to a matinee of Goldmember and managed to get a Pizza Hut Pizza in. I was the only one in the cinema, it was awesome.

>>30672659
done that once, nothing happened, would do it again. only works in cinemad where they check your tickets at the main entrance and not at the entrances of every seperate cinema hall...

>>30672640
Oh, wow. Good thing you don't go there anymore. It's always good to have two-four backup theaters where you know that shit doesn't happen.

>>30672659
All the time. Best thing to do if you decide to fuck off from school or call off from work if to hit the theater for a matinee (around 1:30pm) with older people. Watch your flick, then leave and casually walk into another one that's starting. It's the tops. Sit back and kick your feet up or lay down horizontally. They're not paid nearly enough to give a shit. No clue what'd happen if you're caught, though. Probably told to never come back. If the situation ever presented itself and a cop wasn't present I'd likely get up, pretend I didn't hear them, and walk out. What are they gonna do? Kick my ass for it?

Every time I go, I take a big thing of pick and mix from the cheap place around the corner. I also frequently take microwave popcorn in little sandwich bags. It's easy, because I live in the UK where I can walk into a cinema and not get strip searched. Hell, one time my friend just ordered a pizza and walked in with it under his arm. Not a word from any staff.

>>30672492
In some areas, yeah.

>>30672705
they sell food and beverage in every theater but it's expensive and it's not a matter of being poor, it's about being smart and not getting ripped off.

>>30672564

top lel m8

>food
>sleazy burger

>>30672672
The best.

>>30672775
Damn that's weak.

>>30672754
Every theater I've been do have some dude or lady way at the front checking tickets. It's like a game of Hitman. Motherfuckers never turn around. I've walked right past a lady once. She didn't say or give a shit. Went in, saw Tokyo Drift, and laughed at my friend who had to pay for himself and his girlfriend while I walked in, walked OUT, then walked back in again sans ticket.

>gf wants me to go see Waitress with her
>tell her I'll meet her there
>stop by liquor store, pick up bottle of Bacardi
>get to theater, get large soda
>go to bathroom, dump out half of soda
>replace with Bacardi
>sad movie suddenly become hilarious

also, sageamento goes into all fieldamentos

>captcha: ffumdic spritus

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I believe the god-tier food smuggling experience would be sneaking in a bucket of chicken into the theater.

Just imagine it. Imagine everyone else having to smell the aroma of your chicken.

>>30672912
No, God tier is having the local chinese place deliver to you at the emergency exit door of the theater your in

>>30672912
How could you pull this off?

>>30672969
Y-you can do this?

>>30672864
that's the way they do it in my home town, if you get a ticket for a 11am showing you can even get away with watching 4 movies for the price of one. at the cinema in the town where i go to uni however, they check your tickets at every seperate cinema hall so no chance of doing that there.. damn greedy jews, like it makes a difference if i occupy a seat nobody was gonna sit in otherwise

So why do you have to smuggle? frenchfag here

what happens if you go into a theater with your snacks in plain view?

>>30672764
>>30672754
My theater has cameras in every room, I don't know if they check them for possible intruders but they don't even have security so I don't know if they give a shit

>>30672912
>Easy difficulty
Submarine Sandwiches
Meal from home
Finger foods
Alcohol

>Normal difficulty
Pre-cooked chicken
Burgers
Yogurt/Ice cream

>Hard difficulty
Mexican
Chink food
*Chink food where the guy meets you at the theater
Ribs

>Insane difficulty
Bucket of chicken
Medium/Large Pizza
*Pizza where the motherfucker delivers to the theater

>>30672969
ahahahaha please tell me you actually did that, i don't care if it's a lie

I only bring food with me that is not noisy or smelly. I'm not a dick.

>>30673009
They'll probably ask you to throw it away. And if you refuse, they'll ask you to leave.

>>30672978

Just bring your gf and tell her to hide the bucket under her shirt. If the movie guy complains have her yell "rape" and punch his face in and then receive your americlaps and enjoy your chicken.

>>30672992
>>30673040
I did it, and here's how. Find a chinese place that can understand english directions and a theater that's under staffed that doesn't take care of it's door alarms. I only did it three times and only in the one theater that had the unmonitored door but each time it worked pretty well.

>>30673058
Wouldn't an oversized purse work just as well?

And hey, no GF? Borrow your moms clothes.

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Are you guys serious or is this just a fantasy thread?

I get smuggling in candy/drinks but fucking full size meals? Why don't you fucking eat after the movies like normal people.

>>30673058
>hiding a bucket of chicken under your shirt.

>>30673022

I have a plan

So I'll find a guy in a wheelchair and befriend him and then take him to the movies with a box of pizza in his lap and cover it up with a blanket

If they start asking questions he can scream discrimination by cis scum

>>30673007
>like it makes a difference if i occupy a seat nobody was gonna sit in otherwise
Exactly. And what's up with assigned seating in theaters now? Telling me where to sit. The nerve of that shit. Lax security otherwise, though.

>>30673009
I've brought in burgers before. Hell, I walked past the invalid they had taking people's tickets. 'Course I was fucked because I was walking into a 3D movie needed them specs so I had to buy a ticket and flash ti at him to get the glasses.

>>30673016
Damn, man. Where do you live?

>>30673076
you sir are a hero!!!!
and here i was feeling like danny ocean after sneaking in a kebab and a small soda can

>>30673108
>I get smuggling in candy/drinks but fucking full size meals? Why don't you fucking eat after the movies like normal people.

Because fitting a meal AND a movie in during my lunch break from work is fucking impossible.

anybody seriously tried to bring crab legs?
someone should do it and take pictures for /tv/

>>30673140
I'm not a hero, I was just really stoned and lucky.

>>30673138
i live in germany, we've always had assigned seats over here... i hate the idea of having to go early to get good seats, on the other hand our system has the logical result of good seats being more expensive so i guess both systems are flawed

>>30672302
>Me and a few buddies smuggle food from the nearby food court.
>Get to the movie late so we have to sit in the front row
>Decide to make a picnic area by taking up the front and casually eating and watching the movie

Oh that was fun but we got kicked out of American Gangster really fucking quick

I believe if you just carry something in plain view and act like nothing is there and nothing is wrong, they'll ignore you.

>"Sir, you can't bring that in here."
>"Bring what in here?"
>"That pizza, you can't bring it in."
>"What pizza?"
>"Sir, you're gonna have t- You know what? Fuck it. I don't paid enough for this shit. Just enjoy the fucking movie."

>>30673162
No you're just fantasizing, who normal-fag with a decent enough job to allow a ~2hr lunch break wouldn't have a fuckign ipad to watch a film.

You're stupid as fuck.

>>30673204
belittling your own heroic deeds only makes them more heroic fine sir

>>30673162

How much do you make an hour to be able to afford that often?

>>30673114
I'd smuggled burgers in under my shirt. No one is stopping me from my fine american dining. Had to remove that shit because I looked fucking ridiculous, though.

>>30673121
That's perfect, actually. Women's purses and shit works, too, but a wheelchair is a god-tier idea. You'd have sit in the middle, though. In that one section that divides the upper seats from the lower seats. That kind of sucks but, hey, pizza. Fuck this you need a wheel-man at every outing. They can't be too hard to come across.

>>30673108
I'm not seeing what the problem is.

My friends smuggle McGangBangs in their pants.
We're all 20+, this is this shit I have to deal with on a daily basis.

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>>30673222
>mfw I get trips

>>30673219
That sucks, bro. I feel for you.

>>30673222
>picnic area
>to American fucking Gangster
Hey, had to spice up that movie somehow. Good on you, bro.

>>30673271
no need for an actual disabled person, just steal a wheelchair and have your buddy sit in it. once in the theatre he can just get out of it when noones watching

>>30673329
Yeah there was at least twelve of us and I got a fortune cookie for everyone from panda express shit was cash.

>>30673233
>I believe if you just carry something in plain view and act like nothing is there and nothing is wrong, they'll ignore you.
This is what I do. If someone is really hounding you then they must be under pressure from management to curb people bringing shit in for reasons I can't fathom. If that ever happens then the people cleaning the theaters are being cocks and fucking up the rotation for everyone.

sandwich + french fries + coke in a bag, but I don't think it was not allowed. It was an awful experience, since I entered with 5 minutes of movie (Social Network) and had to find all the shit into the bag in the dark, trying to don't make noise.

>>30673249
I do set ups for parties/receptions/corporate events at a hotel and having 2-4 hours a night with nothing to do is completely normal. We get one hour deducted for lunch and the rest of the time we just sit around waiting for whatever it is to end so we can reset the rooms for whatever is on the next day. The hotel is about a fifteen minute walk from a theater and a bunch of pizza/chinese storefront places, so it's fairly easy to do.

>>30673268
Depending on the events, between $15-$25/hr., but I don't really do that too often, I think in the last year I've done it maybe five times. My first post was mostly a joke.

>>30673345
>no need for an actual disabled person

hey man thats racist

>>30673345
Yeah, wheel-man would be god-tier. Only problem is finding one of them shits.

>>30672356
In Peterborough, Ontario, the theater charges 9 bucks for popcorn, plus a dollar for butter. It hurts.

>>30673373
>trying to don't make noise.
Collateral damage. Victims of war. Can't be helped.

>not acting retarded like that one guy on Curb Your Enthusiasm
>not bringing in food in plain sight

>>30673381
You mean finding one that isn't morbidly obese that WON'T eat your pizza before you sit down.

an*

>>30673381
>tfw i used to volunteer at a care home and could have even stolen one of those electric ones that cost more than 1k
why didn't you niggas give me that idea a year ago

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>>30673404
>charging for butter
I wish a motherfucker would.

>>30673404
Wait, they charge for butter? No wonder Canada is a land of communists and terrorists.

>>30672569
Uh, no I wouldnt. Why the fuck would I get tazed for politely telling them I dont give consent? And why the fuck do they have tazers? Do you live in chicago or something?

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>2013
>not clean bulkin' in theaters

>>30673417
You better have someone act as your tard wrangler, though.

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sneaking my vaporizer into 4 different films were all exciting experiences

>mfw getting high during Skyfall

>smuggling in full meals
>Not having an alamo drafthouse

>mfw it's still a bit expensive
>tfw you buy food anyways

>>30673466

What's the point of getting high -during- the film? I like getting high and watching a movie, but you can just do it beforehand.

>>30673466
dang i always wanted to do that, what was it like? and which vaporizer do you own?

>>30673492
Thread is full of lies, new friend. Nobody is this stupid.

>>30673441

They don't in any theaters I go to. The butter is at the table with napkins and condiments, you can put as much on as you want.

>>30673138
>Damn, man. Where do you live?
France
they don't have cameras in the theater rooms where you live?

>>30673492

Maybe he likes to be really high throughout the film, it teeters out after the hour mark

>>30673404
>a dollar for butter
If a theater manager ever thought about charging me for butter they better wake up and apologize.

>>30673426
I think offering them a slice would be enough to buy their silence.

>>30673435
Re-up and steal that shit, man. Stash it in a closet for the rest of the year.

>>30672397
>not eating brownies in advance to kick in at start of movie

do you even cannabis?

I hide water bottles in my bra all the time

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>>30672433
9/10

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best thread on /tv/

im in stitches

>>30673521
No, sir. I'm in Los Angeles, California. If there's a camera in the theater room watching everyone then I'm completely unaware because of all my years no one has ever acted on it. I'll keep a look out from now on, though.

>>30673526
If you give a fattie a slice of pizza...

>>30673510

That one doesn't seem so far-fetched though. I've seen people smoke weed in theaters before.

>>30673526
me and the care home did not part on good terms, going near it would not at all be a good idea

Wait, are you not allowed to bring your own food into a movie theater?

>>30673438
>>30673441
Yep, it's that fucking bad. Not many theaters do that though, this one is just the epitome of Judaism

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>>30673574
>we did not part on good terms
I need a story. This shit is too good.

>Not stashing a few burgers up your ass and taking them out in the theater bathroom.

Have fun paying $20 for a large Popcorn, faggots

>>30673572
What kind of asshole tries to sweeten a deal like that?

>>30673581
This. I'm curious. Do you really have to go through all of this?

>>30673581

apparently in Clapistan, it's not allowed.

>>30672407

OF COURSH

>>30673566
>California. If there's a camera in the theater room watching everyone then I'm completely unaware
you're being watched
they have cameras everywhere

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>>30673506

Magic Flight Launch Box friend. Hiiiiighly recommended.
>>30673492
because I just felt like it. The only shitty part was..
>somebody gets up to bathroom/get popcorn
>THEY KNOW

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As a teenager I would sneak 40's into the theater in my jacket. I don't know how I got away with it, looked really obvious.

>>30673581
>>30673668

Yes, they want you to buy the food inside.

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>>30673730
Land of the free

>>30672978
>>30672912
>>30673022
this >>30672564 is me. It wasn't even that hard. Maybe being a highschool students and having everything in our backpacks helped, but it wasn't like we were bringing a fridge in

>>30673755
Can you really get fucked up over malt liquor? I walked in drunk into movies before but I always lose my buzz around 15 minutes in.

>>30673492
I agree, but the point is that you can get super baked vs. burning out during the last third of the movie. Also the "because I can" mentality
>>30673510
I've never done it personally, but my friends have put a portable vape in a fountain pop cup with the end sticking out of the straw hole. Vapes have a smell, but not really like weed. Just sit in the back row and you are good

>>30673616
not much of a story to tell, sorry to disappoint.
basically what happened was management was treating the volunteers like shit and i didn't want to put up with that so i gave them shit for it, a week later i get called into the head nurse's office, they point to a portable gas cooker i had left in the volunteer lounge the day before and tell me one of the managers had just "found this, boiling hot, sitting on one of the heaters" (it was the middle of july) and told me that they where very sorry but had no choice but to ask me to leave, something about me being irresponsible blahblahblah....

>>30673510

what you think I'm lying? bro it wasn't a big deal.

>Django
>Skyfall
>Moonrise Kingdom
>The Hobbit
vaped in all of them, it was a fun time

>>30673757
The worst part the gross over pricing. 12 bucks for coke and popcorn. 6 bucks for a hotdog, 5 for a pretzel. candy boxes 4 bucks. Its horse shit.

>>30673775
I'd be really fucking mad if I smelled chicken in my theater. If only because I didn't think to bring any in. Time to steal some backpacks.

>>30673809
hes an idiot. Vaping in theaters is easy and smart. Props to you

>>30673809
>getting high and watching The Hobbit and Moonrise Kingdom

You have given me a new goal in life.

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>>30673791

wanna know the funniest part? My vape is recognized for its burnt popcorn smell. perfect

>>30673809
tell me which vaporizer you use already goddamnit

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>>30673855
haha I was going to say, the MFLB is known for smelling like burn popcorn. Well done sir

When I saw 'Project-X' at midnight there was a whole row smoking and passing around a huge bottle of vodka.

>tfw when I wish I was in the row instead of with my pleb friend and gf

The crowd was hilarious. The experience made the movie better than it was.

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I sneak candy in all the time. I haven't tried fast food or anything like that. Seems like a hassle, I just want to watch the movie with a snack, not while I eat a meal.

>>30673784
Malt Liquor can be stronger than beer depending on brand. 2 forties will get you a good buzz, 1 won't do too much though.

>>30673775

they check your backpack though if you bring one into a theater, dont they? at least they did for me the one time i did bring a backpack into a theater while i was visiting friends in LA

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>>30673860

pic related. Magic Flight Launch Box

>>30673905
this happened in LA, well pasadena. I've brought bags in like crazy and they've never checked me, nor would I let them

>>30673885
Gotta love rowdy theater audiences.

>>30673959

huh, i originally refused but they told me they wouldnt let me in if i didnt let them check it. i was with a few friends though and didnt want to ruin the evening

>>30673887
>I sneak in candy
Go to bed grandma you're drunk

>>30673959
I've never been asked for people to check my shit. If it ever came down to it I wouldn't let them, though. What kind of Mickey Mouse organization sets off to check people's bags and shit?

I've smuggled a bucket of hotwings into the theater once. I should do that more often because in Germany the prices for popcorn (or nachos) and soda are fucking horrific.

Large Soda: 5,50€ - 7,20 USD
Large Popcorn: 5€ - 6,50 USD
total: 10,50€ - 13,70 USD

+ ticket 10€/13 USD
= 20.50€ or 26,70 USD

>>30674012

haha, drunk grandma, that's funny.

>>30673944

HOLY FUCK THOSE THINGS ARE EXPENSIVE

>>30673944
You got some faggy hair

>>30674052
Sneaking in candy is like taking a pack of gum into a theater. Only someone really lame or really old would consider that a story worthy of sharing where people are talking about bringing BUCKETS OF FRIED CHICKEN AND BURGERS UNDER THEIR SHIRTS WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING?

>>30673944
what is this?

Target right in the same mall as my local movie theater.

I usually get a bag of Swedish Fish, maybe some Twizzlers, and a Vanilla Coke.

>>30674175
>I bring in candy am I cool yet lol ^_^
No.

>>30674175

There's a dollar tree in the same shopping center as my AMC 24. I can usually pick up some candy, some chips and a drink.

Although one time I did get my gf to sneak in some chickfila for us to see Iron Man 2

>>30674246

It's not cool. I just like candy.

Also you misquoted me.

>>30674130
lol @ people smuggling in buckets of fried chicken and bags of several cheeseburgers n mchicken sammiches underneath their t-shirts

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>>30674293
chick fila?
you supported the monstrous ANTI GAY CONSPIRaCY AGenDA

>>30674130

I was answering the OP's question!

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>>30674101

dude, it's so worth it. It paid for itself in the first month.

>get baked off of sprinkle of weed
>smoke the sprinkle of weed after you're done vaping
you get double the weed you pay for, basically.
plus it's discreet as fuck
>mfw Hobbit while baked

>>30673944
>>30673944
I use pic related. how finely do you grind your weed before you put it in? I've been told that vaporizers can potentially get you higher than joints while using less weed, yet i always end up using way more weed to get as high as i would from smoking it

>>30674330
>not sneaking in a nugget tray from Chick-Fil-A.

There's a P.F. Changs right across the pavilion from my theater. Shit is so cash.

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>>30674388
damnit forgot pic

>>30672764
I sneak i all the time. most of the time i dont even pay for a ticket at all. but ive been caught a couple times and all they do is say "oh uh you cant be in here", then i act like i made a mistake or something thats it, its nothing.

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>>30674390
You would be a god among men.

>>30672356
Where do you live? Here it costs at least $35 for a small soda

>sneaking in rat-tier ChickFilA and not glorious Wingstop
Do you even chicken?

>Be on date with ex-qt-gf
>Both incredibly stoned
>Just picked up a ton of snacks and goodies and soda from the store
>We both forgot to put it in out pockets
>Walk into the theater lobby, waiting in line for ticket booth
>Staff and ticket lady can clearly see us holding all our snacks
>Out of nowhere, I go, "WAIT, WE'RE HOLDING THE SNACKS"
>"OH FUCK, SHIT"
>We both run out of the lobby and into the mall like scared children
>Staff inside lobby hear us having a nervous breakdown outside, then laughter for 20 mins
>Put all the shit away
>Walk back in, nothing happened
>Buy our tickets
>Aside from a couple smirks from staff, we get in just fine
>Take our seats in the theater
>I open my soda
>It explodes all over her face
>Spend next ten minutes (opening credits) laughing our asses off
>Find new seats

True story.

>>30674458
Where do you live? I had to sell my first born son for a large ICEE.

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>Midnight showing of the Hobbit with little sister
>Sneak 3 of these in
>Drink 2 before the movie starts

These things are fucking strong, I was up until 5AM

>>30674489
>Out of nowhere, I go, "WAIT, WE'RE HOLDING THE SNACKS"
>"OH FUCK, SHIT"

Lost it.

>>30674514
where do you live? here it costs at least for you for a small can of coursh

>>30674533
>5AM
>acting like that's impressive.

Get real, son.

>>30674514

Where do you live? I contracted my immortal soul and half of my yearly income for the rest of my natural life for some snow caps.

>>30674514
>>30674551
Man, that's rough. I only had to sell my liver, a kidney, and my left testicle for a tray of nachos. Oh yeah, for the cheese they stabbed me in the lungs.

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>>30674489
>>Out of nowhere, I go, "WAIT, WE'RE HOLDING THE SNACKS"
>>"OH FUCK, SHIT"
>>We both run out of the lobby and into the mall like scared children

>>30674546
I feel sick for having laughed so hard at that.

>>30674589
Where do you live? Here I had to pull out arthur's sword, banish the cliffracers from morrowind, buttfuck the nerevarine into Oblivion and then punch the dragonborn in the dick to get a secondary glance at a drip of cheese that fell on the floor

Yes me and my exgf did it a lot. Always put food and beer into her handbag

>>30674620
i feel retarded for having typed that, /tv/ really fucks up your head man

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>>30674630
>>30674589
>>30674551
>>30674514

>>30674641
I've begun to say it to a few co-workers (for you, was ___ a part of your plan, do you feel in charge, and this means you have power over me?) and then I giggle like a retard and think about going home and getting on 4chan. This site is ruining me.

Gonna need a tier list of what kind of alcohol to bring in. I'm doing this shit next time I go to the movies.

>>30674710
I can imagine some faggot doing this and it's making for enjoyable laughter

>>30674761
Bring in some form of vodka then purchase High C from the from the theater and get your drink on like a high tom titty.

>>30674388

I have two friends who have that vape. It gets me fucked every time. I use about .4 every time in the Magic Flight and it gets the job done

That looks so good rn

>>30674548
I realize it isn't really but to go from the half asleep state I was before the movie to that was pretty crazy.

>>30674710
haha time to an hero

>>30674809
>drinking at the cinema
fuck that shit you can't take it seriously.

We spent the entire film acting like niggers.

Ended up making everyone in the theatre laugh at a joke.

>>30674818
i should try to find someone who has it, not about to spend another hundredsomething bucks on yet another vaporizer without testing it first. the iolite is decent enough, i just wish it was more economic

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>>30674533
You stayed up a whole 5 hours? You fucking boss.

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>mfw I work at a movie theater and I still sneak in food

nigga, even with my employee discount shit's still expensive

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>>30674972
>we spent the entire film acting like niggers
I love doing this in crowded theaters. Me and my buds usually occupy a corner of the theater and hoot and holler like we've never been civilized. The movie just drones on and we eventually come down, though.

>>30675051
I wonder what it'd be like to watch a film on ecstasy.

Still never been to the cinema baked though.

>>30675085
That's the one substance I've never done. And not for lack of trying. No one ever carries that shit. It's ridiculous.

>>30675115
Damn, sucks to be you, over here it's hard NOT to get ecstasy.
In fact getting ecstasy on loan is easier than weed.

>>30675045
This. I can get up to four tickets for free for any showing that I personally attend, though, so at least I don't have to pay for that shit.

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>tfw the movie theater is just an extended part of your room because you fart, smoke, eat and fuck while watching movies

oh god my dick that burger looks pretty OP.

>>30675234
Wait what

>walk into the theater eating a hamburger and drinking a cold soda out of a straw
>hand the drink to the ticket guy
>give him my ticket
>take the drink back and continue to the theater
>um sir... you can't bring that food in here
>stop and look him in the eyes
>oh you must be new here, this is America
>enjoy the credits while finishing my burger and soda

>>30675239
Wendys has the best burgers. Never any Wendys around any cinemas, though, and for good reason.

After reading this thread I want to smuggle tacos and bourbon into the next film I go to.

>>30675298
Fuck you americans are so lucky having all this fast food shit I tried Wendy's and IHOP once they are 1000x better than the fucking only things we have here: Mcdonalds, kFc and Burger king

Never had a taco
or a chick-fila whatever the fuck that is

>>30675286
you took till the credits to finish a burger? shit story

Where is that burger from? And yes I smuggle popcorn and soda/water into the theater nearly everytime I go. Im paying 8-11 dollars a POP and they expect me to throw down another 7 dollars for a bag of popcorn that I wont eat in 4 minutes during the previews? And they over fill the cups with ice like ass holes.

Where is that burger from

>>30675332
u german too?

>>30675445
No

Scottish

Yeah brought some spaghetti in once, a deli sandwich, and a hamboiga.

While I am indeed American this was not all at once.

>>30675445
No.

Scottish

>>30675357
He saved it man. He enjoys a good AMERICAN burger with his AMERICAN credits. Are you not AMERICAN enough?

>>30675462
don't fucking complain then, i've been to your country and you can get decent burgers ANYWHERE, pubs, delis, wherever. come to germany and see how you like it and then think twice before you complain about fastfood in scottland again.

>>30675490
If he was eating a burger during the credits, how did he clap?

>>30675539
With his feet

>>30673959
Pasadena? Was it at the arclight?
Fuck South Pasadena High School, btw

>>30675525
I haven't found a decent place to get a burger anywhere near where I live, KFC is miles away.
I went to Spain and there were a few fucking amazing takeouts that cooked better burgers than Mcdonalds and better chicken than KFC could ever try

Eh, smuggled beer a few times. never actual food.

>>30675594
well at least you have haggis... oh wait that shit sucks dick

>>30675638
I wouldn't know I've never tried it

>>30675272
He's saying that short of sleeping the theater is like an extended part of his room. And he's right.

>>30672328
Popcorn isn't supposed to be filling you fatass.

>>30672356
>$5
Thats about how much it costs ANYWHERE BUT the theater

>>30675638
Haggis is terrific you pleb.

>>30675661
me neither i was just trying to make a joke about scottish food
where do you live if there aren't any decent burger places around? i've only been to edinburgh, there where plenty of good burger places but i guess comparing edinburgh to the rest of scottland is like comparing berlin to the rest of germany

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>went to IMAX to see Hobbit
>ticket alone was $15
>got a bottle of vitamin water and a pack of sour patch kids
>was charged $14

I watch all my movies at Alamo Drafthouse and get drunk off of Guinness with a fantastic Royale with Cheese.

Why smuggle anything in?

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Me and my roommate brought 2 full bottles of this to see the Avengers, one bottle each.
It was fucking hilarious, no one cared...until I had to get up at least 3 times during the movie to take a leak

>>30675761
jesus

>going to see movies in theaters
>not buying your food from low cost bulk outlets and watching from the comfort of your own home/apartment
>not being able to pause the movie to go to the washroom

>>30675734
how does it taste, i'm beginning to regret not having tried it when i was in scottland

>>30675782

>piss three times from one bottle of beer

Are you 60 lbs?

>>30675311
>tacos and bourbon
You're playing russian roulette with your asshole.

>>30675789
Hard to describe - very rich, smooth mellow oats, bit of liver taste, beef, onions - it's sort of like a big moist sausage mixed with heavy stuffing.

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>>30675782
haha what

>>30675575
>Arclight in Pasadena
My friend works there. Gets me free tickets and shit. They don't check your bag there. Eeryone is pretty chill from the gist of it.

>>30675898
gb2/b/

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>>30675878
My anus is a constant source of danger - that's just how I roll baby

>>30675882
real sausage taste (ie european) or those dreadful english ones they serve at breakfast?

>>30675963
Oh god no - european. Those white things are... I don't even know what they are.

>>30675859
no im really skinny, beer makes me piss a lot

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>>30675925
Why would I do that?

Fun fact: Theaters make more money selling popcorn and shit than with the tickets, since it costs them a fuckload of cash to get the rights to show the films

>>30675991
fuck me that sounds tasty as fuck then... gonna have to go to scottland again soon, thanks for recommending it

>>30675991
No. I need an answer. What the fuck ARE those white things? Looks like dog dicks.

>get a fucking halloween-level bag of candy and a soda at the Price Chopper across the street for like $6
>hold them underneath my coat while walking in
>spending lots of money avoided
>cum a little bit
>enjoy the movie

been doing this for years.

>>30676057
Seriously I don't know - I got a sausage roll earlier this week, and it had those things in it. They didn't even have a sausage texture - they were almost like fatty compressed bread or something - it was awful. I'm not a man to waste food, but that got chucked pretty quickly.

>>30675918
That's why I was surprised when I read "Pasadena". Arclight Pasadena is probably one of my favorite theaters in SoCal.

>>30676129
>candy and cum stained underwear
It's like I'm really at home

No, but one time my friends brought four sandwiches and a few bags of chips.

>>30676172
Hell yeah, motherfucker.

>>30672356

$13.75 here.

>>30676133
tell me about it... as i mentioned earlier, i used to volunteer at an english care home and lived there over the course of my stay, so i had to eat what they served and they didn't serve anything but those filthy abominations and those black blood cake thingys that are even worse for breakfast on mondays AND thursdays, shit was not cash at all

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>>30673527
>not eating them before the movie and continuing to eat them during

plebian

>>30672356

Where the hell are you? That combo is over ten dollars where I live.

I remember seeing a post on /tv/ where a guy smuggled in two or three bottles of beer.

>>30676133
i also get the wasting food thing, i used to give people shit for not finishing their food but not anymore dude, not anymore

>>30676255
>not hiding a 12 foot bong and 2 lbs of weed under your trenchcoat
do you even weed

>>30676309
>not walking into a movie theater smoking your 12 foot bong
do YOU even weed?

>>30676262
lucky Americans. where I live, popcorn costs over ten euros, which is something like 15 dollars

>>30676347
Guess it's time to start smuggling chicken, huh?

>>30676243
>>30676133
that's what i meant by blood cake thingy, apparently they're called black pudding. if anyone ever offers you one of those, punch said person in the face for me

>>30676370
chicken is even more expensive, and pretty terrible quality too