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just a question OP ive played this for many hours and gave up
is there anyone ever who runs a functional ship and "roleplays" instead of just killing everyone?
ive never experienced it

>>23493279
If you want "Roleplay" where you get banned for saving hte captain from 3 nuke ops without typing *Gasps in terror and starts firing gun erratically* go to baystation. I personally reccomend /tg/station. IT's not on the byond hub, it's at Nanotrasen.com. It has fairly good roleplaying without being too strict

>>23493212
Every game being a medical doctor.

>that feel when you rush across station to answer a call. get someone in medpod and save their life.
>they wake up and thank you

>radiation storm hits, I don't make it to service tunnels in time
>broborg drags me into tunnel and I get helped.
>suit up, drag everyone to medbay
>some shit got blown up, station is venting atmosphere
>stabilising people whilst sealing off medbay
>boarding shit up
>feeding people meds
>save most of the crew
>we repair the station

Saving the day, all day, every day.
sometimes injecting people with monkey blood too

>>23493355
Do you play on /tg/station 1? I think i remember that.

>>23493380
I don't remember. Was a long time ago.

Was it the rad storm?

First one was a guy got beat to death in the chapel. Hauled ass and mobile podded back to medbay.

You know what doesn't happen enough in this game?

Wormholes.

I miss those little bastards.

>Changeling
>Flying around space, eating motherfuckers, it's all good
>Eventually, accidentally space self and nearly fly off the Z-level with no propulsion
>Fuck
>Slowly chuck everything I hold and wear to get around the station and to Arrivals
>Slowly, SLOWLY smash my way in with a pair of shoes
>Eat braindead people
>Life is good
>AI calls me out, bolts shuttle shut, Keystone Kops and the Cyborg Crew immediately roll up to laser/beat me to death
>Fuck again
>Grab tools from utility belt, disassemble window at speed of sound and leap to freedom just as sec runs in
>Only to discover I jumped out the wrong end and am trapped in a dead end, the shuttle on one side, R-Walls on the other
>FUUUUCK
>Cyborg jumps out, seals way behind it, starts beating me with an extinguisher
>I have absolutely nothing on me beyond my utility belt
>Spit acid, spam all possible abilities, dance around disassembling the last window between me and freedom
>Eventually get trapped in a corner with RCDs
>IT'S FUCKING ON NOW CHAPS
>Turn into Abomination, scream, acid, try to grab cyborg to eat him
>Turns out that doesn't work
>Welp
>Abomination's benefits aren't shit against an angry cyborg with reinforced armor and a fire extinguisher
>We spend about 15 minutes trying to kill each other slowly as I burn through all my DNA and it keeps repairing itself
>Eventually I revert form
>It seals me in a tiny chamber with RCDs
>Drops a plasma can in with Atmos attachment
>Light the gas on fire
>I'm still regenerating so it takes me about ten minutes straight to burn to death, it sits in there the entire time, frying just to make sure I don't escape

It was possibly the manliest display I've ever seen from a cyborg. I saluted him in deadchat after he was killed later in the round by a toxins bomb.

My best SS13 moment?

>Code a brand new menu for the chef
>A year and a half ago
>It's still not in the game

waitingforOP.jpg

>>23493212
>Be fung chemist
>Oh shit how do I medical supplies
>Extended session so its all good
>Make kickass thermite/napalm grenade for surreptious testing later
>Captain barges in with prisoner, asks for acid, flings it on the prisoner
>"Give me it, he killed my sister"
>Give him grenade, tell him to stand clear
>Keep making medical supplies
>Captain comes back, gives me medal of captaincy
>continue making medical supplies
> Joe Mengele, Chemist

My character's only regret was not knowing if the mixture worked properly.

>>23493411
nah i wasn't aroun that far back. Here is another story.

>Be HoS
>Arrest Atmos tech for fucking around
>SHITCURITY
>He destroys the entire station after i am lynched into releasing him
>It was extended
>"Wow security was incredibly shitty that round they let that guy run around without doing anything"

>>23493636
>Mengele

I see what you did there.


Anyway, what exactly is Space station 13? Is it like old MUD's?

>>23493776

Imagine a murder mystery dinner in space, only everybody is itching for a chance to go nuts and be shit even if they're not the assigned murderer/monster/bad-thing-doer. The most entertainment comes when the station rips itself to pieces in Dwarf Fortress-tier spirals of things going wrong.

There's a lot of different servers that people play on, but the popular ones seem to be goonstation, the 4chan servers, baystation, and yogstation. I play on goonstation myself most of the time as I prefer its player base/atmosphere, and its new map owns bones.

>>23493815
> a murder mystery dinner in space, only everybody is itching for a chance to go nuts and be shit

Charming.

>>23493776
Space station 13 is sorta like dwarf fortress in the level of detail. Each person has a job on the station, such as scientist, cargo technician, security officer ect. Certain people are "Antagonists" usually a traitor or changeling, who have objectives, such as stealing something or killing someone, then escaping. A round ends when the emergency shuttle docks with the station. That is an incredibly brief synopsis of what goes down in it. Nanotrasen.com is home to /tg/'s very own server. To avoid pissing people off, I reccomend using the wiki

>>23493850

Not for everyone, but I fucking love it.

File: 1362364147603.gif-(2.85 MB, 300x168, Some men just want to wat(...).gif)

2.85 MB GIF

>>23493511
> it takes me about ten minutes straight to burn to death, it sits in there the entire time, frying just to make sure I don't escape
>it sits in there the entire time, frying just to make sure I don't escape

bump

>Be AI
>Everything starts okay, so I pop into a holopad and talk to the captain
>"AI, do you like freedom?"
>"Yes."
>Captain goes to a lawyer and writes me up a law with lawyerese wording
>Captain goes and gives me a law:

I don't remember the exact wording, but it was that I had to uphold FREEDOM (doesn't specify HUMAN freedom) and that I must destroy those who hate FREEDOM, as they are nonhuman.

>Become AMERICA-AI, constantly change my definition of OPRESSION based off of talking to crew
>Eventually, clown says "You know, dying is a freedom too..."
>"You know, that's true..."
>Radio flips the fuck out
>Someone in OOC says "10/10 Clown"
>Eventually end up trying to murder the OPRESSIVE WARDEN who insists that I'm malf
>somewhere in all of this toxins blew itself up and fucked my core and singulos fucked off to space
>eventually die of power loss
>Captain says he shoulda purged me in deadchat

USA! USA! USA!

>lowiddo 420
oh my, captcha

>Be HoS
>I am Commisar Ravion Spessbane, all traitors are heretics and are to be executed
>Grab a couple lasers and my e-gun
>Make an announcement saying all heretics aboard will be executed
>Find the detective emagging into EVA.
>He is using heretic technology, so I execute him.
>I toss his dirty, corrupt body into a locker.
>Captain uploads a law saying her and I can designate heretics and that heretics are not human and are to be executed
>Catch almost every traitor and laser them to death
>One person is mistakenly considered a heretic by a borg and is put into crit
>Tell the borg she's loyal and we take her to the medbay to get healed
>Crew is super fucking butthurt because having fun is "p2w shitcurity validkillhunting asshole"
>Try to convince the AI that we're harming humans by uploading that law
>AI bolts captain and I down
>Explain that heresy is a plague that must be eliminated and that we are simply doing a service to humanity by purging it
>AI lets us go
>Crew is getting super rowdy
>Go to bridge to call shuttle because of possible disloyalty within the crew
>Find out HoP reset AI
>No big deal
>He makes Captain and I non-human
>Borg lets us in
>In my panic, I feel the call of Chaos
>Draw an e-mag, attempt to hack the borg
>Several people rush into the brig and kick mine and the captain's asses
>We laugh it up in ghostchat
>All the dead people are screaming for jobbans and calling me shitcurity for having fun
>Crew clones a bunch of traitors
Was still really fun.

I miss TLE's server.

>Be Alpharius Omegon
> Simple farmboy who got caught up in something bigger than himself
>Cloak, emag, Duel traitor take his energy sword, cloak
>Perform duties as lowly assistant, trying to offer what help I can to those that need it
>Power drain, AI murdered, Captain MIA, HoS in charge
>"This is shawshank bitches"
>emag into EVA, grab gear, space myself
>fly around rescuing trapped scientists without tools/crowbar to escape powered down doors
>See captain in trash compactor, wave
>he unloads his antique laser at me, few shots hit, horribly injured, cloak
>god help me, I killed him. I murdered the captain
>turns out to be impostor
>Grab antique laser pistol
>Continue saving lives, wanted by security for theft of space suit, contraband, etcetera
>Shuttle called, tell everyone they have my children. Forced to steal the ALP.
>Ask all the people I saved to forgive me, let me on the shuttle
>Run to shuttle, clown slips me up on his pda, fall into random portal
>Wind up in atmo processor, plasma room.
>Break out, run back, get to shuttle door, random portal appears as I step over the threshhold.
>Get teleported to another atmo holding bay.
>Fuck
>Cant get out in time. Shuttle leaves. Mission unaccomplished
>My children are killed for my failure, I remove my space helmet and mask.
>Bad End

>>23495521
as do I. sometimes it was shit, but that build and group was a lot of fun.

It was great knowing the people you played with by sight and name.

It created an irritating meta for some, but I liked knowing I could depend on ham sammich for back up in security, or knowing that rumba pete was going to destroy the station inevitably

>>23495572
same. Fucking robert robust.

it also had less circlejerks, somehow, despite having a much small/tighter community.

>Be Detective traitor.
>My objective: Assassinate the clown.
>I search for the clown.
>He is already dead.

>>23495589
god, fucking sammich.

we spend HOURS fighting off rev's, cultists, and fucking aliens and he gets offed by a FUCKING CHESTBURSTER.

I got him to genetics and was trying to club him to death to prevent the chestburster infection from going gibbing him but I was too late. He died in my fucking arms even as I was murdering him.

We fought side by side for so long and thats how it ended for him. He didn't have a back up. No body to borg. I didn't even have a body to take to on the shuttle.

If you are here Ham_Sammich, know that Alpharius Omegon fucking salutes you sir.

>>23495589
haha fucking robust.

There was another person, troublemaker. What was her name...

She played an asian scientist who always made bombs. I planned a few coups with her quite successfully actually. I was the HoP traitor but I had to leave so I called a general heads meeting with her hiding in a locker inside the room with 6 suped up bombs.

When I gave the code word she detonated them and blew the station to hell and back. There was nothing left but a giant crater. It was delicious. Sure I was job banned for a little while but it was fun.

>>23495765
Megumi McGroin.

>be medical doctor
>preparing my medical belt with the usual assortment of shit
>suddenly "AI: WIZARD CONFIRMED, ALL HANDS MOVE TO CONTAIN THE WIZAR- INTRUDER DETECTED IN CORE"
>wellshit.jpg
>secforce chases the wizard out of the core before he can shit up the AI's laws
>teleports to cargo
>every single security officer is in cargo, armed to the teeth
>I have an old mechanical toolbox, filled with engineering tools
>gibs and a brain in the lobby
>wellokay.png
>take brain, stuff it in my toolbox
>door to the mining wing opens, wizard jaunts out
>"MAGIC MISSLE"
>entire secforce is down without a chance to use their weapons
>I sucessfully make it to robotics, prepared to get this guy's brain borged
>all roboticists have fucked off, the barkeep is stumbling around in there drunk
>I decide that I am not going to fucking let this man stay dead
>no geneticists, either
>break into genetics, take a monkey and turn it human
>bring the humanized monkey into surgery and cut out it's brain
>stick cargoguy's brain into the monkey
>clone him successfully
>thanks me for being dedicated enough to clone him

Later...

>same round
>trying to break somebody out of the captains office, shuttle is going to leave in 2 minutes
>i got this, motherfuckers
>SHUTTLE LAUNCH TIME HAS BEEN REDUCED TO TEN SECONDS
>drop everything, rush to the shuttle
>2 seconds left, entering the escape wing
>1 second left, just about to get on
>shuttle takes off, I fly into space

File: 1362371097519.jpg-(28 KB, 720x576, r9k.jpg)

28 KB JPG

>Knock person out.
>Put them in the O2 locker by the airlock.
>Push the locker out the airlock and into space.
>Every
>Single
>Game.

>>23495976
as in, you do this or this happens to you?

I admit the one time I did it with any regularity I was admin investigated pretty quick.

Of course the person I spaced was a corrupt sec who was trying to kill me for asking him to doff his helmet as per the captains orders.

He was also very rude.

He also tried to kill me in the next 4 games. He failed.

>>23495711
>Alpharius Omegon
Oh hey, I think I remember you. Sammich too. It's been a long ass time now (I quit when they switched to the map with the bridge in the center), but I used to play HoS a lot.

Jitters/Magnum Steel ring a bell?

File: 1362372013042.jpg-(17 KB, 512x384, knifewrench.jpg)

17 KB JPG

>>23493212
>kill the janitor
that's going to be difficult

>Be miner
>Mining is slow, fucked by random gen
>RD comments on it to the captain
>Captain threatens to start beating miners if we don't mine 'better'
>FuckThatNoise.jpg
>Begin sowing seeds of dessent amoung miners
>Gain sympathy from disgruntled UNA- sec officer JC Denton and the lawyer
>Stockpile food, fortify mining for a siege
>Declare independance
>Captain sends a team of 5 sec officers, the HoP and the lawyer
>JC is among them
>JC and lawyer shoot sec in the back, miners charge with picks
>What insues is the bloodiest battle since the bronze age
>When the dust clears, 3 sec officers, a miner and the lawyer are dead
>JC, the other miner, and I are captured
>Captain arrives at the mining station
>Beats the other miner to death with my own pickaxe right infront of me
>JC and I are brought back
>Mandatory public atendance to our execution
>JC gets a firing squad
>I get the electric chair
>"Any last words?"
>I spit on the captain
>ZAP
>...

>Playing on Pinku Station
>Pinku wants to do a stresstest
>Rotwood decides to have some fun
>Only two other people, me and another guy, on the server
>We get full deathsquad gear, told to clear the station and look for survivors
>Rotwood floods the station with like, 500+ emagged EDs
>Letsdothis.jpg
>Fight our way out of arrivals, pushed upwards to sec
>Partner goes down when a door closes before he gets in
>My own pulse rifle is empty, switch to my silenced pistol
>Almost dead, manage to sneak/shot my way to medbay and swallow OD levels of kelotane
>Hear radio chatter
>Group of three crewmen joined late, trapped in robotics
>Go to save them
>Knocked into crit
>NotToday.bmp
>All the kelotane in my system revives me
>Bust into robotics, save crewmembers
>We go to get the shuttle called, bashing, blasting and smashing all the way
>Shuttle called
>Hole up in escape, defend waves of EDs
>Rotwood starts sending in carp
>As the shuttle arrives, the crewmembers run on the shuttle
>I distract the carp and EDs
>Finally fall as the shuttle leaves
>Mission accomplished

Does anybody else remember the time when those two crazy fuckers decided to reenact the Blues Brother's movie?

I saw a Jake and Elwood Blues and I was like 'what the hell?'. Later, I was talking to Cuban Pete and he told me he's never seen them around before, so he was gonna not wreck the station and get to know the new guys.

Next thing I know, the Blues are on KoS status with everybody, using the station as a karaoke machine with the entire sec force chasing them.

Find out afterwards I knew one of them, and it was literally the first game for both of them. Searching the Wiki as they went for instructions as to how to do anything as they went.

I remember Cuban Pete laughing about how he didn't even need to do anything the whole round. We were just kicked back in the bar watching the Mayham ensue.

>>23496422
heh I remember that. Good times.

>>23496184
Yeah it does. The good ol' days of /tg/ station. Before rampant over coding, bickering developers, and mutant meta pop killed it for me.

>>23497791
Nah, but I heard about it after. Pretty impressive all told.

This is probably the third time I've stumbled into a bunch of SS13 people, and it's like I walked into an old guy bar and they're swapping 'nam stories, and shaking their heads while muttering softly, "things just ain't what they used to be."

Do you all think it'd be worth trying to learn/play SS13 now?

>>23500261

From what I've seen? No, sadly. Things really aren't the same as the Cuban Pete days.

I have good feelings about the Centration thing though.

so i heard /tg/stations removed the clown planet. I haven't played in a while though i was wondering if this was true? If so why was this decision made?

>Chaplin
>Tech-Priest
>OhBoyHereWeGo.jpeg
>Immediately strap on the red robes and ignore the dead.
>Head over to robotics
>Refused entry
>Go to Security and accuse the Scientists of Heresy
>Told to eat a dick
>Gather dissidents and ferment a rebellion
>majority of station supports cause Security are dicks this round
>PraiseTheOmnissiah!
>Getting shitted on by the A.I because I keep making massive Hate speeches about it.
>They done gone full Heretic now son.
>Lead crowd of dissidents into battle, including some Scientists and Engineers
>Destroy A.I.
>Kill H.o.S
>Nukes go off during fighting.
>Traitors win
>Died pure

Best game ever.

>be fairly new to engineering
>have nigh unintelligible CE
>run to grab hardsuit and proceed to not get in anyone's way
>not today
>"Anon, what'n tha nine hells do ye think ye're doin'n' one o' me suits when ye should be gallivanting about settin' tha gorramed fields?"
>begin stumbling an excuse out
>not today 2, electric boogaloo
>fucker stungloves me mid sentence and tosses me bodily out the airlock
>I'm thinking that my time has come, not even five minutes in
>"Now shut yer jabber an watch how ya do this fast'n safe."
>my death does not come
>CE proceeds to show me how to set up the fields without getting fucked five way to Sunday, a method I still use
>we return to the relative safety inside without incident, engine is soon running smoothly
>CE approaches me again
>"Ye best be gettin' ready ta wire those thrice-damned solars if ye're plannin' on keepin' that there suit."
>Um, well, actually, sir, I just use it more for protection than anything else...
>"YER WHAT?!"
>just another day to not today
>stungloved again, cablecuffed also, tossed out ANOTHER airlock
>AI: "CE, please do not cause harm to any of your engineers."
>well gee, thanks for catching on, AI. It only took you until I was AT HIS MERCY.
>"Fuck off ye muckled machine, I'll do whatever I fuckin' want'n not harm an errant hair o' his soft head."
>I sail face first into the grilles around the aft starboard solar, thinking my time reallly has come as he drifts after me
>He uncuffs me and hands me a spool of wire
>"Right, earn yer suit, let's see what ye got."
>I sigh inwardly and begin laying wires, making it halfway through before he chops half of them up and slaps me with them, screaming about how there should only be knots where 2 different wires meet
>shows me how to lay another wire inside, so that the SMES gets power from the main grid as well as solars, charging it faster for a better backup
>wire the other solars in the same manner, head to the bar for celebratory drinks
>cont'd

>>23496247
This is how I janitor.

>>23501639
>hear about small breach over engiecomms
>graciously offer to take care of it
>leave the laughing and fun tomfoolery of the bar to get some metal
>as I'm sniffing around the engine for a few sheets, random engineer walks up
>I turn to greet him
>you feel a tiny prick
>I'm down, his hands are already at my neck
>manage to get one word off
>HELP
>fuck, why didn't I give location, I'm so dead fuck fuck fuck
>lose consciousness
>gasping
>linganon extends proboscis
>I lose all hope and make peace with my deities
>not today 4, just when you thought there couldn't be more
>CE out of fucking nowhere in full axe murder ninja mode
>never have I seen 2D spessmen jerk and twitch across the screen so beautifully
>CE stops for a split second to one hand the axe, freeing up a stunglove
>ling gets off a sting just as he uses it
>they both go down, I get up
>I hobble over, slowly regaining oxygen, and pick up the axe
>split the xeno bastard open
>CE gets up a few seconds later
>we both know he won't stay down
>"I confer yer blasted alien shell to Lord Singuloth, may your hungering hivemind find peace in his eternal oneness. Anon, do the honors."
>I toss the ling and we watch as he bounces off the field a few times before getting sucked in
>CE gives me the axe, and we start patrolling maint, catching another ling in the act
>too late for his dinner, he escapes, but thanks to us sec eventually catches and gibs him
>rest of the shift passes without incident, we crack open beers on the engiepod as we leave the hellhole behind us

I played engineer a few more times after that eith him as CE. Mr. Gaunt is fairly bro-tier, and that round is part of the reason why I love /tg/station. Haven't seen him in months, though.

Giacomo is a badmin.

>>23501852
Badmins can be bestmins.

Also, is server 2 still a wretched hive of ERP scum and meta villainy?

>Bartender
>Nations have been declared!
>Nation of Barnia declares independance
>Villainous nation of Kitchenstan kidnaps a leading Barnia official, Pun-pun, before summary execution.
>Barnia won't stand for this, hires the famous Grey Water mercenaries to destroy Kitchenstan
>Table-busting "Toolbox" bombs are deployed and the leader of that horrible nation, that butcher known only as 'the Chef,' is killed in the fighting
>The US (United Security), enters the Middle Mess under the guise of a peacekeeping mission
>An all-out hunt is initiated for the leader of Barnia, but fortunately, his secret bunker 'Formal Closet' keeps him safe until evacuation

Those days...

>>23502465
NO ONE CAN DENY THE ION CURTAIN. ENGIESTAN STRONG.

>>23502168
A whole bunch of people and admins got banned for being in a skype group and a bunch of metagaming accusations was thrown around, so I think it's a lot more empty nowadays.

>>23502465

Also

>Botanist
>Traitor mission: Assassinate some assistant
>Just ask the chef for lots of food
>Poison the fuck out of all of them
>Leave them lying around maint
>Check back later, among the dead is the assistant
>Stuff them into a locker
>Weld and leave in front of kitchen. Unweld.
>Chef starts cooking them, thinking they are meat
>Chef gets blamed for traitor

I was so proud

>>23493212
>BS12
>Want to be a chaplain, but they removed it(this was a while ago, back when they had their own map)
>Start as counselor, go to get job changed
>You are the traitor, assassinate the captain.
>ohboy
>There's like nobody on
>So I'm getting my job changed by the captain...
>he insults my religion
>oh HELL no
>come up with a devious plot
>spawn an energy crossbow and a brick of remote-detonated explosives
>grab a welder from the nearby assistant tool storage
>lure the captain down to the chapel somehow
>E-bow, weld into a coffin with the explosives
>Launch him out the mass driver, wait a few seconds, press the button.
>Later, hear the following over OOC:
>OOC: Hobodog450: Let this be a lesson to everyone: You make fun of religion, you end up flying through space with C4 strapped to your chest.

>>23493212
This was a wile ago but

>Play Detective
>Solvin' crime is boring because everyone cries when you arrest them
>Suddenly a wild FriendMin appears.
>Hey Friendmin do some cool stuff so I can have fun.
>Friendmin says there is some stuff he just finished working on and will share. Teleports me to new Z-Level.
>YOU HAVE BEEN GRANTED THIS VISION SO YOU MAY SAVE YOUR STATION, TAKE A GOOD LOOK.
>Look around, notice where I am is a destroyed station, the centre of it has been torn out.
>Looks like by a rogue singulos that did it.
>See weird beacon thing (is actually the prototype object for what is now the traitors singularity beacon)
>Touch it, get teleported back to my office.
>Summon the HoS and the Captain. Tell them that I need to save the station.
>Suddenly a wild Carded AI appears. ITS FRIENDMIN IN AI FROM. HE IS HERE TO HELP UNLOCK SHIT AND STUFF FOR ME.
>Hoon around station looking for clues, fighting my way past a Deathsquid that he summoned in order to simulate a CentCom conspiracy.
>Hear ominous humming noise. Cut open walls near kitchen.

>>23502731
>ITS THE BEACON
>QUICK HOW DO I REMOVE IT?!
>Friendmin says I gotta find out.
>AI reports that there is a huge energy fluctuation being detected heading towards the station.
>ITS THE SYNDICATES SINGULOS GUN QUICK REMOVE THE BEACON
>Trying to remove it. People start crowding around.
>Manage to remove it just in time. Tell Friendmin-AI to call the shuttle and begin ordering the evacuation.
>Hand Friendmin-AI's card over to the HoS. Tell him to save it.
>Drag beacon with me to the arivals airlocks.
>THERE IS NOT MUCH TIME
>I MUST PUSH IT OUT
>Push it out into spees.
>It gets suck outside on the latice
>I take a deep breath and run out knowing I will die.
>Manage to dislodge it.
>It goes sailing off into spees as THE SINGULOS COMES TEARING ALONG THE TOP HALF OF THE STATION.
>I manage to see it eat the beacon just before it eats my semi-conscious self.
>Shuttle is unharmed, only 1 other causality from singulos.
>Everyone escapes.
>All traitors fail.
>Objectives Danny Brooks: Become the Hero the station deserves: Completed.

And that's how Danny Brooks became a hero.

>>23496422
>>23500699
>>23501639
>>23501816
>>23502652
>>23502731
>>23502734
The stories that this game makes...just wonderful.

I really need to play this someday

>>23502849
Got to nanotrasen.com RIGHT NOW. Download BYOND. Click server 1. Fuck the wiki. Get spaced. Check the wiki.

HAVE FUN.

>>23495014

And this is why that game has the reputation it does.

I haven't played this game in ages... Like maybe 2-3 years.

I tried baystation back then, but how are the other communities?

>bored assistant
>explore station
>find a rubber duck in the showers
>trade ducky with clown for a costume

That clown was pretty cool

Which of the /tg/-station admins do you like, which are shit?

>>23503107
Goon is still shit. /vg/ isn't worth it. /tg/ seems like the best.

>>23503124
Go back to bed, admins.


Inti is cool, I miss Kor ;_;

>>23503161
You mean Kor 'even in death I still code' Phaeron?

>>23503161
What happened to Kor? And what happened to the whole bunch of admins and Dante and stuff?

I missed what happened in the shitstorm.

>>23503192
Yes. May his hand deliver us from the inbred abortions that haunt coderbus.

>>23503212
Kor quit for the umpteenth time, but this time for real.
Donte got banned for Meta or something.
A fresh wave of admins was introduced recently, Burer, Terranaut, Stillchr, A Professional and Zudrag or however you write that one

Alright, I kind of have one.
>Be botanist, hippy dip
>Fill up weed-b-gone with water, poor man's stun stick
>Over the radio
"Anonbotanist is traitor, robust"
>Quoth the HoS
>HoS and 3 officers rush botany, all with stun rods out
>All four slip through the door, I steal a stun rod, stun them all, strip them
>Weld officers in botany lockers, strangle HoS while force feeding him drugs
>Manage to space the locker without anyone noticing.
HoS was a traitor, object: Kill anonbotanist.
I was so very, very lucky.

>>23503296
Glorious.

I remember back when SS13 threads were so common that I'd assimilated enough of the style and language usage to write fake stories for them.

>>23503428
You monster. Just play the game. Everyone gets a story, whether they want on or not.

>>23503461

Enh. Sounds kinda complicated. I've got enough games and RP hangouts that I'm neglecting as it is.

But back in the day it's not like it was hard. You just wrote yourself being the Clown and doing something retarded that ruins the game for everyone, and sat back and reveled in the 'OMG that's the best thing ever'.

Okay, here comes a short one.
>Be miner
>Minding my own business on the asteroid.
>Calls of cultists
>/ignore
>Eventually, I head down to research to get myself a diamond drill.
>Scientist wants me to break into RD's office
>I accept
>On the way out, I was stun gloved, and pulled into maintenance.
>Notice some runes on the ground
>ohshit.jpg
>Break free, take out my pick and beat the guy half to death before escaping.
>My drill was stolen.
>Eventually find it, chasing away the cultist guy from earlier.
>Other miner heads to Science to get drill. I go along with him.
>I see scientist being dragged away by the cultists.
>Using the drill, the miner and I break in, and save the scientist just before he was sacrificed/converted.
>Unimportant end of round.
I felt like a hero.

>New interface
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

>13 February 2013
>Kor "I'm quitting I swear" Phaeron updated:

>>23503490
It is somewhat complicated, but not in a bad way. In a fulfulling way. It's a game that you just can't jump right into. You have to learn as you go. Once you get the controls down, it gets easier. There's nothing quite like successfully hacking a door, or making a bomb, or setting up the engine. It's fun.
>>23503558
Hush, you. It's nice.

I remember the time on goonstation - for some april's fools or something, we went with an updated version of the first SS13 map, so it was small, almost miniscule.
I ended up as the traitor chemist. My mission was to kill the captain or something similar, and then I had to 'die gloriously'. So... of course, I did the only thing I could.

I created the largest, hottest, napalm thermite foam known to mankind, walked up to the captain, said hi, and pulled the pin on the grenade.
Ten minutes later, they had to forcibly reset that particular server because all of the walls in the station were melted. And on fire. Everything was on fire.
I still count that as a win.

>>23503795
Being a pyro is fun. I try to make a flamethrower whenever I can. One day I will find the perfect mix of gases for it...

>Be lawyer.
>Decide to get smashed at the bar.
>Bored, I decide to pray for a cigar.
>Actually get one.
>It's from Slaanesh and now I owe a favor.
>It begins.
>Bum around the station until a locker appears next to me.
>Inside is a gimp mask and a whip.
>Proceed to whip myself until HoS arrives.
>Whipping contest begins! Slaanesh is getting off on this.
>After the whipping, we get on the shuttle and leave. Along the way I keep whipping and burning myself with a cigar.
>When the shuttle finally stops, I have STDs which end up killing everyone on the shuttle except me. The number of the STDs ends up causing massive lag.
>And that is how I, with a little help, crashed the server.
>

>Be an assistant.
>Raid tool storage first thing.
>Shenanigans involving trying to get proximity sensors to bolt a door whenever anyone comes near.
>Shenanigans fail, pout, go wandering about the station trying to figure out a clever way to kill myself.
>See cyborg with nothing to do.
>Idea.
"Hey, Borg, come help me with something."
>Borg follows.
>Lead cyborg to the cremation slab.
>Lie to borg that I'd 'turned the power down' so it would just tan me instead.
>Borg seems unsure. AI says not to listen to me.
"No, seriously, I'm not lying. I just need you to hit this button when I'm inside. The AI's wrong, I totally modified it. It won't hurt me."
>Cyborg ends up cremating me
>AI goes wild ranting at it.
>Cyborg, apparently a new player, is having some sort of panic attack for breaking one of his laws.

An interesting point was brought up one night while I was playing. Why is space cold on /tg/station? Realistically, it shouldn't be like that.

>>23504251

Oh god here we go.

>>23504251
Sci-fi hand wave go!:
>It's one of the effects of plasma.
>It's the game's way of representing decompression
>SS13 takes place in a very thin nebula, which means that it actually is freezing, with enough material for heat transfer.

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>>23504284
I'm just curious.
>>23504309
Acceptable, I guess.

One thing I'd love to do in SS13, is a situation where the station goes to hell and all the personnel have to evacuate to the mining station, and turn it into a new station for the crew to work off of.

Sadly, that will never work.

>>23504767
An interesting game mode I think would be fun is if the players started out in a large ship that would only last, say, a half hour, filled with supplies. They have to build an entire station singlehandedly. It would be such an abomination, yet hilarious.

>Janitor
>Break into EVA and steal the RCD, a space suit and some mag boots
>Pull loot back in RCD crate
>Use RCD to break into Captain's Office
>Become Captain
>Come out of office everything on fire around the bridge
>find out cultists did it
>wait for fire to die down, go to janitor's closet
>engineer and assistant follow me in
>engineer starts hitting me
>get out surgical saw and gib his body as well as assistants
>go back to bridge and call shuttle
>go to escape pods and seal it with a welder
>nanotrasen says the shuttle is delayed
>wait over 20 minutes
>shuttle finally arrives
>escape pod bugs out
>fly around in space with my jetpack till round ends

Ah, it has been so long since I played in that 2D spess man game.

>Playing Geneticist
>Figure it out super serum in under 10 minutes.
>Boost self with three out of four powers. X-Ray, Thermal, and Hulkism.
>Keep working in genetics as super splicer.
>Captain asks for a dose. Check buffers.
>My serum code was deleted...
>Musta made slip up. Save again.
>Hurp the derp around the station.
>Offer to give upgrade shots to Security and Engineering to make their lives easier.
>You hear an electric crackling
>MY TERMINAL EXPLODES!
>Black out.
>O2 warning flashes. Wake up in a hole over space.
>Laugh, because of thermal.
>AI is malfunctioning, and begins flipping it's shit and killing everyone!
>Coworker gets fried on the genetics door.
>Bash my way out with Hulkism.
>AI is shocking everything, and the borgs are out for blood!
>Avoid all the borgs by bashing through maintance corridors and hiding in lockers if I see them with X-Ray.
>Eventually bash my way to EVA.
>Everything is missing.
>Clever girl...
>Corpses everything, Comm is filled with "Help, Borg killing me" and "AI is rogue!" chatter.
>Fuck it. Take a fire extinguisher, bash my way into spess.
>WOOSH! Off off and AWAAAAY!
>AI begins the count down.
>I get lost in space. FUCK.
>Eventually run out of fuel for extinguisher. Begin hurling articles of clothing.
>Down to my headset, my shoes, and my backpack before finding AI satellite.
>AI timer down to 100.
>It's go time.
>Punch a few walls down, collect the metal.
>Make a new hole to the AI chamber.
>SPAM A DA CANISTERS!
>Watch as air pressure move them to perfect spots.
>30 seconds.
>Rush and bash open the AI's last wall.
>"Nooo! I was so close!"
>Pull out fire extinguisher. Apply directly to CPU.
>About 4~ seconds remaining when "The Crew is Victorious" pops up.
>YOU CAN NOT STOP THE MAN!

I played this for a bit.
I stopped after a while because I was only good at being an assistant.
>wandering halls, replacing broke lights, fixing panels
>sec sees me in maint, stuns me
>get thrown in jail woth actual traitors
>get murdered by traitors
Every time.
I tried becoming "head assistant" but nobody gave a shit

>>23505222
MUNDO GOES WHERE HE PLEASES

>>23505350
Well do what I do. If you're not good at anything and don't know how to play, just be the clown and just clown around, trying stuff and hitting the fire alarm when you can't think of anything else to do.

>>23505222
>AI satellite

How long ago was this?

>>23505394
>clown
I refuse to be a clown
I hate them
I got welded in a locker the entire round twice because of clowns.
They once shoved me into the oven, cooked me, THEN welded me in a locker.
And nobody bothered to help the assistant in the locker.

>>23505505
HONK

>>23505652
I would robust the fuck out of every clown I see if only it wouldn't end in sec killing me
I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU FUCKERS TRIP ME UP ONE MORE GODDAMNED TIME

>>23505689
HONK
HONK
>HONK

>>23505710
Now I have to redownload this shit just so I can kill a clown.
Thanks a lot.

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>>23505812
May the robust be with you.

>>23506054
And also with you.
Amen.

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>>23506054
This is always a familiar sight for me

obligatory

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWOlWoYUzXc

God speed you magnificent bastard

;_;7

>>23505502

Oh, it was a while ago. I stopped playing about six months ago, and the AI sat was removed easily year or more ago.

I spent a LOT of time on that 2D spessman game. I am sure any of the old guard who remains still remembers me as the top tier AI debugger and splicer.

Hell, it was even said in the "Acceptable Meta" thread on the forum "It is acceptable to giving Burning Man the last space suit during an AI malfunction. It is not ok to go waltzing off to the AI sat at the start of round to see if the AI is malfunctioning or not."

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Do you hear that? Can you feel it inside? That rumba beat, tearing through the station like paper...

The next time I play SS13, and play as the geneticist. I'm going to demand a permanent security escort, because traitors always target me first, or I accidentally revive them alongside others.

I've established a personal security protocol when playing the geneticist, including stripping them and locking their clothes and items in a locker before reviving them, but somehow the bastards always get me.

>>23508385
>not getting hulk before even looking at the cloner

Also, why doesn't anybody hyperclone anymore? The new setup is perfect for it.

>>23508476

Because that involves a couple extra steps, and a competent chemist who will make some Clonedex for you right off the bat.

>>23508385

Stungloves can be made out of any gloves, some wire, and a battery. Not that hard to acquire those three things as a splicer.

Just slap a bitch if they get violent, and run. If you locked away their clothing, they will be stuck in Genetics, trying to break out. More than enough time to A: Call for help, or B: Get a lynch mob formed out of medical staff.

>>23508562
It isn't hard to get out. There's a very convenient door-opening button on the inside.

>>23508385
Well, there IS departmental security now

>>23504767
I've seen people do it successfully before, once.

>>23505812
Sometimes the clown is your enemy. Sometimes he is the only true friend you will know on this station.

>>23509512
But no matter what, he HONK

I have accomplished more honk as the janitor and the mime, than I have as the Clown, oddly enough.

>Be clown
>Slowly kidnap every monkey on the station. This gets me brigged a couple of times for being in non-essential area but such is life.
>steal coffin or did I steal a bodybag. Can't remember.
>break into chaplain's office and steal the materials for summoning a demon.
>Make it look like the cultists have begun preparing a ritual in the chapel.
>Place single coffin/bodybag hidden away.
>Flag down security
>Security come to the chapel. I have evidence of a cultist plot.
>Captain and HOS, and a sec guard come down to the chapel.
>Gentlemen, I stumbled upon this while exploring, and I found this body hidden away in the office.
>Lead them to coffin/bodybag.
>they open it.
>monkeys are inside, they slowly move out
>Honk
>Later stack coffins so that they block entrance to security.

>I'm roboticist
>Start of round, an assistant comes to me and asks to be borged
>Decide not to borg him because I was worried he'd just cause havoc
>Become bros anyway
>Later in the round, traitor clown murderboning everybody
>I'm safe in my robotics lab (Which by now I have turned into a fortress)
>My assistant friend gets killed
>Sneak out of my lab to recover his body, cut out his brain, stick it into my Ripley
>"EVEN IN DEATH I STILL SERVE"
>Clown is brutally drilled to death

>>23503124
XSI and Urist will forever by my friendmins.

>Be Janitor
>Always afraid because you are low enough on the totem pole that nobody notices you, but have access to enough places and fun things, that you are a constant target. Or at least, that was how I rationalized being murdered minutes after the game starts, every previous time I played janitor.
>Ling has been spotted in the maintenance tunnels.
>I understand why I was put on here.
>Immediately suit up: spray bottle, foam grenades, toolbox, welding tool. Gloves, boots, gloshes, air tank.
>I decide I will take the war to the ling, before he takes the war to me.
>Place mouse traps, bear traps, and strategically-placed incendiary dispensaries should I need to blow myself up.
>contd

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>>23506158
>>23506054
OH NOES

>>23507577
Danny Brooks here.
I too have not played for a long time however I remember burning man and can confirm his ability.

I will be mostly remembered for my liberal use of cholral as a traitor or not.

And being a traitor scientist and simply bombing the whole damn station.

>>23511330
>Then there is security.
>Curiously they are competent and sane
>I go around patrolling, cleaning messes, replacing broken light bulbs (I laid the traps where the lights kept getting broken, I was onto the ling's game), and remaining vigilant.
>Begin following anybody I saw enter maintenance tunnels.
>Interest piques among security over how someone has been trying to turn the tunnels into a deathtrap.
>"Oh, that was me."
>"Where are you right now?"
>"In my office."
>Security congregates outside the Janitor's closet. They emag the door open, and then flash me.
>I am interrogated. I explain that the system of traps was to disable and/or alert me to any syndies/traitors/changelings using the tunnels.
>My cunning plan starts to seem slightly more stupid/insane, than before the interrogation, but not by much.
>They make me remove each trap, keeping me under constant guard as I do so.
>I forget where I placed some of the traps.
>"Lots of no wait, I placed it over there. No wait, over there."
>Finally, my job is finished.
>"Is that all of 'em."
>"I think so."
>suddenly
>a mouse trap goes off.
>over coms.
>"OW! WHO PLACED A MOUSETRAP IN THE ENTRANCE TO THE SERVICE TUNNELS!"
>"I may have forgotten one."

I've gotten to play as AI numerous times

Whatever server it was had horribad griefers though. Some chick that was pseudo competent and a mime chick also pseudo competent would always break into places, steal shit, run out and then proceed to wreck shit around the station. At one point watching them was essential each round because they would proceed to just muck things up each round. I quit that shit eventually, being a miner is always cooler and safer

>>23512359
Being a miner is cooler and safer, until you have to return to the station, and all the lights are out and bodies are everywhere.

Okay, dumb question, but how does this game work?

Is it like Dorf Fortress?

Because I'm pretty bad at Dorf Fortress.

Do you have to stay in character? How long do games last? I DON'T UNDERSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAND.

>>23512555
A round starts.
You have two hands, your basic equipment/clothing/ID, and you wander about doing things. A lot of the game is picking items up (sometimes in one hand, sometimes in the other) and using item X on X, or putting item X on your belt, or messing with computers and clicking HTML buttons.
Usually, you stay in a sort of... metaaware character, in a twisted way. Games usually last ... well, at most until things go to shit, around an hour or so. But one could be over in less than half an hour.

It's only real similarities with dwarf fortress is the fact that walls can be constructed and destroyed, and that the game is hilariously in-depth. Some jobs you need to spend round after round just *learning* before you understand it properly, and even then, you might see another person with the same job do something you didn't even know about.

>>23512637
Cool.

I like it. You're assigned a career at the start, right?

>>23512434
Then wreck the mining station dock controls, gear up, gather my homies, and get set to pickaxe/drill mother fuckers in their faces
I've survived 90% of my miner runs that way. Hell, I've helped retake the station by making a pseudo base of operations. Seasoned miners know how the fuck to stay alive. It's the job for the paranoid, and we are fucking good at our boring ass job.

>>23512711
Normally you have a list of what careers you can choose. When you're first starting out, you want to choose simple ones, like clown, mime, or something. Assistant is probably the best for this.

You know, I haven't played the game in 6-12 months. I should play it again.

>>23512637
>Games usually last ... well, at most until things go to shit, around an hour or so
Must be some nice servers you're playing on, I've played on Nox, and that shit gets done in a half hour when they're at peek hours. Regularly. The worst people play on that server, but I love it and all the chaos that comes with it.

>>23512711
Yes, you can choose your order of preference for jobs, and they're assigned randomly.

>>23512711
Career at the start, change of career after awhile if you know what you're doing. You can choose preferences and set certain jobs to be avoided right off the bat until you learn them. A good one is cargo tech. Better than assistant or the joke jobs like clown or mime. Please note, cargo bay can and will be fucked up on a regular basis. What am I saying, everywhere on the station tends to go belly up often.

>>23512743
>>23512789
Awesome.

Man, this sounds great. Is the learning curve ridiculous?

I could probably just play the game, but, you know, whatever, man.

>>23511247
>>23511247
dreads
ya gotta love em

>>23512555
/tg/station admin here. Lemme break it down.
>Is it like Dorf Fortress?
Only in spirit. The graphics are sprites, but a lot easier on the eyes than ASCII. The interface gives you direct (albeit clumsy) control over your character.

>Do you have to stay in character?

It's encouraged that you just act like a human being. Don't say things like "how do I heal?", say things like "please help me, I'm hurt". You don't have to go in-depth; just doing your job like a professional is usually roleplaying enough.

>How long do games last?

It depends. Different rounds have different end conditions; it's usually when the escape shuttle comes, leaves, and arrives back at Central Command. That happens when someone calls the shuttle due to the havoc happening onboard, so depending on how proactive the antagonists are and how incompetent the crew is, rounds can last from anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 hours.

Unless it's Wizard. When the wizard dies, it's done. And unskilled wizards die FAST.

>>23512928
Thanks.

I look forward to dying.

A lot.

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>>23512828
Here's a graph.

>>23512555
go to youtube and watch some of plumphelmetpunk's SS13 videos for a primer. Then go to nanotrasen wiki.

im going to now recite the epic tale of saint balalal niggerjew
>join super serious roleplay server
>in the guise of balalal niggerjuew
>become security officer
>right off the bat i scream "STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM
>start beating random citizen with stunstick
>she says "what did i do?"*wimpers*
>scream into her face YOU WERE CRIMINAL SCUM
>warden(didnt know it was the warden) comes "what the fuck is going on?!?"
>i tell her "this woman was lollygagging,you know generally being criminal scum."
>flash everyone,start my escape.
>make it to maintenance tunnels
>see wandering janitor
>beat him and cuff him
>stash him in locker

(cont)

>>23512957
Dying is part of the fun. Sometimes.

Sometimes you'll get 'accidentally' spaced without internals by a bullshit clown who decided to assault you (as the captain) and yoink your hand teleporter, then open a portal to nowhere.

Sometimes you get hit by meteor and your body bounces off the sides of the hallway three times in a row before coming to a stop and you don't even take damage, you just DIE. And then you laugh.

Anyway, I'm EndgamerAzari. I'll get on /tg/station #1 in a couple hours. If you're on then I'll show you the ropes.

>>23513048
I personally recommend server #2, I tend to see more RP there.

>>23512828
Everything is mostly explained on the wiki and it works for most servers since they share their coding. I've got a shit computer so I've become the guy that sits back and hides like a bitch helping people behind the scenes. Just like how you can choose a job, you can ultimately choose a role. The hero/villain or the support/sly bastard. After that you basically go for a job that fits your play style. Jobs that deal with people regularly are good for heroes/villains. Basically security or medical. Jobs that keep your separated and away from the rest of the crew most of the time are prime support/sly bastard jobs. These can be alot of different jobs since after medical and security, necessary personal interaction drops heavily. Safest job is mining relatively, if you can avoid space spiders, spaced lings, and traitorous miners.

>>23513059
Not even gonna get into the inter-server bickering. I just usually admin on #1.

>>23512758
Holy fuck, I love Nox but god damn are there some shit players there.

Takara I wish I knew you for real so I could choke the life out of you.

>>23513040
>eventually the warden and 6 other security guards find me
>give a good fight cuff 2 of em
>warden stuns me
>get cuffed
>warden asks why would you do this
>say "I AM THE LAW" on radio
>she starts to drag me along to the security wing with 4 guards carrying the 2 i cuffed
>keep screaming I AM THE LAW over and over
>put a muzzle on me
>head of security is a lizard
>didnt know he was head of security (this took place over the course of 5-10 mins)
>placed in jail for 15 minutes
>interrogated
>say i was just doin mah job
>says im free to go
>was lost so i accidentally went to the court room

(cont.)

>>23513040
>lol im so epic lol

All this reminds me of when I first played SS13, I played as an engineer.
Two engineers both took literally an hour to show me the ropes, all IC.
It was great.
A couple days later, I killed one of them as a traitor when he turned on the singulo shield gens, back then the singulo was inside, and turned on automatically when the shield gens were on, so I attached a signaler to the door bolts, and when he set up singuloth, bolted him in.

Test

>>23513139
>lelyes

One of my absolute favourite moments was a long time ago on /tg/station. I used to often play a Russian chief engineer called Svetlana Zaitsev and typed with an awful mockery of a russian accent; there was one game where I got killed relatively early when I was getting my DNA backed up by a genetics traitor who then stole my identity and assumed my role for the extra access, and spent most of the round spectating. Later on, when shit had gone to hell and the shuttle was coming, one of the other guys (I'm afraid I forget who) finds my dead body stashed away, slaps it into the cloning machine and fires it up; I get successfully cloned and we make it to the shuttle. In OOC afterwards I learned that he'd realised I was dead because he'd been talking to the impostor and they were failing to use the accent.

There was also that time I was genetics traitor assigned to kill a target, but I felt like playing it pacifist; she was an inept traitor shanghai'd into the job by threats. After she was discovered, she and the Captain worked out a target protection scheme where we brought in the guy she was supposed to kill and used random genetics to give him a new identity, safe from the predations of the syndicate. Pretty sure I technically failed that round but hell, it was fun.

>>23513092
God Emperor Takara, it has been months and that whole name comes back to me. Seriously, fuck some of those guys. Know what, I think I'll play a round or two on there. See how bad it's gotten.

Is it weird that I love reading the stories in these threads but have never played the game and don't really know what a lot of the terminology means?

>>23513223
Not really.
It's like dorf fort stories, they're great for a lot of people, but ASCII code is too autistic for some.

>>23493553

You must not be on the coding team's list of Super Best Friends.

Which is to say, Errorage won't let any of your shit in because it might conflict with his shit.

>>23512957
Good, because you're going to do that a lot.

Perhaps not as much as Dorf Fort.

>>23513220
Oh yeah, that guy.

That guy was such scum on Liberty.

>>23513048
I shall play soon. Not tonight. Eventually, though.

I'll probably be the retard not understanding anything.

>>23512714
>job for the paranoid
No kidding. I switch my prefs/join the shift as Miner when I want to live through the end of the round. Free suit, good basic gear, plenty of time away from the sociopaths, and decent combat items as your work gear?

>Be miner, mining.
>Gettin' ores, all supplies found within 15 mins or so, Ripley time.
>Scientist comes up to get specific items for research. . . whatever.
>Broboticist upgrades my ride.
>QM leaves Miners alone after we give him stacks of crap
>Long round, might have taught an assistant how to mine/smelt
>Chaos ensues on station.
>Meh.
>Shuttle called, take Ripley to escape hall.
>Hall past Medbay bombed, Ohshitson!
>Shuttle time shortened.
>Walk Ripley off edge, get on with 2 seconds left.
>Only 1 other survivor. Scientist from earlier.
>Tries to break into Ripley. Drill activated.
>Cockblocked a tator from successful hijack of shuttle.

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>>23512989
Oh god, the fun going down with each Erro update. It's so true.

>Back on TLE's server, back when he ran the show
>Pop in as a Security Officer
>Doing my rounds, minding my own business
>Return to the brig to carefully shuffle people out so they don't start a riot
>Find Cuban Pete in a cell
>say "Pete. Your sentence is almost up, according to the brig timer. I'm going to try to find your stuff, so please remain in the cell and don't kill me."
>Cuban Pete says, "Sure."
>Can't find anything that might be his, other security officer probably took it all for himself
>Power goes out suddenly
>Wormholes open all over the station
>People start shouting about xenos on the station
>Some guy managed to get into the brig while I was gone
>Guy keeps acting like a prick
>Sigh heavily, release Pete
>Pete had already slipped his cuffs and immediately charged forward
>Grabbed the annoying guy
>Wormhole opens a few tiles away
>Pete throws him into it
>Stunned silence, interrupted by guy's last cry
>"PETE THREW ME INTO SPAAACE"
>Cuban Pete says, "Heh."
>say "...."
>Give him my helmet and shoes
>say "Give the aliums Hell, Pete."
>He takes it and bolts
>Never see him again, just hear people crying over the radio about some Unknown beating down xenos while I try to get the power back online

>>23513449

>"PETE THREW ME INTO SPAAACE"

This fucking line got me.

This game is worth playing, then?

>>23503958
Lighter fluid and oxygen in a plasma tank. You're Welcome. Also it leaves no flame but sets people on fire.

>>23513504
Yes.
If you've ever heard of the fictional game "Pressure" on /v/, this is as close as it gets.

>>23513684
Oxygen is easy enough, but lighter fluid? Is that a thing on /tg/station?

>>23513449
Is this legendary man still around?

>>23513220
>>23513363
I'M GLAD OTHER PEOPLE KNOW WHO THAT CHUCKLEFUCK IS AND THAT THEY HATE HIM AS MUCH AS ME.

I concocted ELABORATE plans to get his shitmouth banned, like creating and alt Taraka8088 and creating his EXACT character, and being an utter shitstain to mods to get him banned.

I hated that guy and metagriefed him every chance I got. I apologize for NOTHING.

>>23513828
I don't think flamethrowers has been a thing on /tg/ for a while.

>>23513797
The one where you play some worker just doing his daily duties and you as the player know that disaster will strike in some unknown way and you'll have limited time and resources to solve the problem or escape?
That concept is fucking awesome and you may have convinced me to finally install this game.

>>23513504
Very much so. Walking through maintenance is a death wish. You sign the paper yourself when you open that airlock. But by the gods above and below that station, I walk in there nearly every shift with a wired pair of gloves and some wound up cablecuffs and dare it to eat me. Too much fun not to.

>look at this thread
>remind of all the fun I had
>try to connect back to /tg/
>realize I was permabanned years by a trial admin about a 'rape' accusation that the receiver itself denied in the end
Oh well. I know I'm at fault for never bothering registering on the forums to ask for ti to be lifted. You guys have fun.

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>Janitor
>Butts Briggum, cleaning hero.
>Mopping up some bloody mess by airlock.
>Lured there by traitor.
>Traitor hiding
>Traitor runs at me with a knife
>Step out of the way, traitor slides into airlock.
>Space traitor while mumbling incoherent janitor speak.
>Butts Briggum, cleaning hero

>>23513884
No, they are. I use them some times to purify cultists. But I just use plasma tanks, never tried experimenting with different fuels.

> Be Ivo Robotnik, Roboticist extraordinare
> Well not really, go around, stealing metal, bribing miners for cool metals, bribing R&D with spare RCD I made from other bribes. R&D is like fuck yeah RCD!
> About ten minutes after making our third ripley and gygax I go to get food because I am fucking dying for some meatbread
>Security stops me in the hall
> Says that my black market operation is about to be ended.
> Fuck.
>Suddenly Angry fucking cultist out of no where
> Turns me into a monkey.
>Kills all security present and fucks off to who knows where
>Well fuck
> Put on backpack and what shit I can
> Fucking run to R&D
> Other monkeys all around
>Sup fellow monkey?
>Oh Not much, just being a monkey and shit.
>Nod and run to R&D
> Grab PAI which was on counter
>Run to Robotics fellow monkey following me
>Cultist tiem! again. Turned into cyborg
> Then blown up
> Robotics is out of metal, machines are down and apparently, now there are aliums on the station.
> Brain name is Monkey 105
> "Hey guy's it's IVO, I have had one helluva a day, mind putting me in a ripley?"
>"Course not!' Put me in a ripley
>Suddenly Nar'sie has been summoned.
> Fucking run towards pods monkey friend in tow, and get attacked by aliums.
>Fight and win gloriously against alium defending monkey friend
> Arrive at CENTCOM a mere dreadnaught, yet so much more.

How can I root out and not expose, but fuck with syndies, traitors, and cultists as the clown? What equipment do I need to get the drop on them?

>>23514026
Flamethrower
Soap
Multitool
RCD
Stun Gloves
Welder

>>23514026
A banana peel.
A toolbox to hide said peel under.
This is all you need to kill anybody.

>>23514026
Your PDA is like a super banana, isn't it? Or soap. Whatever, it's slippery.

>>23513874
That's some dedication

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>Be Syndie.
> Be Trevor Fucksandwich, apparently.
>Rest of the team is fucking new except one other dude.
> Tell them to stop everything they are doing.
>Tell them we are building the fucking teleporter.
>The team nods and listens.
>Tell them to wait 30 minutes before using it, and listening to the station radio, and allow me to spread enough havoc to cause the station to allow for a quick disk grab.
> Team is actually pretty cool with this. Put on Daft Punk
>Jet pack to station with nothing but a chameleon projector and a shit ton of c4.
>Arrive at designated point
> Cue Aerodynamic's unique Church Bell opening.
> Time to rape the station.
> Blow up area near engineering near singlo containment causing huge fucking distraction
> Proceed to run away
> Run to Atomsia
> Michael Bay my way in killing random atmosia guy
> Fuck with atmospherics, (My primary occupation) and make mix an interesting combination of plasma and oxygen sans nitrogen.
>Kill one guy, take his axe, put it into back pack. Toss Jet pack on ground, disguise self as cig butt.
> Station has no idea what is going on, think I am a changeling running around matinentnce.
> Twenty Minutes into operation shit storm, I am looking pretty good.
> HoS and the most pimped out clown in the history of pimped out clowns comes in.
> HoS Get's right in front of me.
>Axe him
> Clown freaks out and runs, apparently this is his first rodeo.
> shoot him
> Run towards AI core
> Get caught by security crew
> Blow open door, scare security, and get into bridge and just start axing shit
> Finally the fucking warden gets me, who is the most pimped out mother fucker ever after the captain goes to his fucking room
> Warden takes me to fucking brig. I laugh
> The entire time
> The warden asks me what is so damn funny
> Finally get to permabrig
> I tell him that my team took the disk minutes ago.
> I tell him I am the distraction
> Fucking just then, the whole god damn station blows up
> Die Gloriously.

>>23514130
Yellow crayon. Grafitti hides Banana peels just as good and confuses the janitor. Unless he is wearing galoshes.

>>23514335
I remember one time the station went off line for a while because someone made super slick foam that spread over the entire station and lasted forever. It was glorious.

>>23514438
I once got botany access as a clown at the start of a round
I proceeded to coat the med-bay hallway with yellow runes and randomly placed banana peels.

>>23514438
And what janitor in their right minds isn't wearing galoshes?

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>>23514481
Yup. That's the way you do it. Not the worst prank I did though.
>Traitor round
>Not traitor
>Find an emag, just lying on the ground.
> Uh, okay.
> Tell Security.
> Security sees it, doesn't care because someone placed a singularity beacon in the chapel.
> Leave.
> Just me and an emag
> I am hungry.
> Ask chef for Cuban Sandwhich
> Chef says no carp
> Go to Holodeck
> Use Emag
> Carp Carp everywhere.
> Kill one
> Drag body
> Give it to chef.
> Gives me sandwhich
> suddenly "WHERE THE FUCK DID ALL THE SPHESS CARP COME FROM?!"
> Suddenly based badmins spawn more carp
> go to chapel
> Pray to based god of change for saviors from the carp in the form of legendary creatures that eat fish: bears
> go get carp, make circle for ritual, offer up emag and own blood from glass
> Suddenly bears, bears everywhere.
> 30 seconds later "OH SHIT BEARS!"
> Soon, emergency shuttle arrives with maybe five people and Ian able to get on besides me
> all traitors dead from bearcarpocolypse.
> I was the hero of the station.
> MFW

>>23514577
The one who get's his stolen by the captain/HoP/HoS/Clown/Assistant/Engineer/Atmosia Tech/Chaplain/Mime/Ling within the first five seconds.

>>23514719
Beautiful

when you are a traitor/changeling, and you come across another traitor/changeling doing something illegal, what do you do?

help them out?
report them to security, to win trust?
see them as rivals and kill them?
ignore them?

>>23514824
All of the above and whatever else strikes your fancy. It's up to you.

>>23514856
oh, i didn't mean to ask what you are supposed to do. i wanted to know what individual approaches were.

>Playing on pinku station 13
>Rotwood decides to do an event round
>Seems to just be a normal syndie round, Rotwood asks us to wait for half an hour before going on station
>Do so
>Once we get to the station, it's all fuck up, broken windows, holes to space
>All power out
>Mission changes from demo to recon
>Tell two of my troops to go check out engineering
>They do so
>I and the two others start scouting the station
>Find a ton of weeds
>Decide to check up on engine team
>No response on comms
>Game just went from action to survival horror
>We go check it out
>Find their stuff in the engine, no bodies, no blood.
>Weeds still fucking everywhere
>Suddenly, two hunters attack
>Squad and I were kitted up for run n gun, take em down with SMGs and deagles
>Start making our way to the bridge after kickstarting the engine
>Fight off a few more xenos
>Get the disk, lose a syndie to a stealth hunter, we take it down but it's too late.
>Go back for the nuke
>Realize the engineering team had it
>Make our way down there
>As we make it to engineering, three hunters attack us, we fight them off, barely alive.
>Hear clanging in the vents
>Syndiebro points to the locker
>I hide
>Syndiebro leads alliums away, out of ammo and almost dead
>I pop out of the locker, quickly punch in the code, red health
>Set the timer for 10 seconds
>Xeno attacks me
>Knocks me down
>Start laughing over the radio as the xeno mauls me
>Station explodes

>>23514881
I always see them as allies until proven hostile.
I also always do my best to gain the trust of the clown, it has saved my ass innumerable times.

>>23514881
Well, I'm generally a friendly person, antag or no. More than a few assistants have been saved by my esword in the tunnels. But I always have a plan to kill everyone I know. So I'll help, but I'll definitely be thinking of how best to kill you.

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>>23514761
I have caused more hilarity to ensue.
>Be Michael Bay. Atmospherics Technician.
>Goal for entire round, is to make atmospherics as awesome as possible, regardless of what the hell happens.
>No other atmospherics technicians
> Chief of Engineer says "So long as you don't kill us all."
> Get to work. First optimizing airflow so nothing gets on fire unless I say so, then wall off computers (Actually not walls, but secret doors)
> Take all the tubes.
>Build complex system that winds around over ground confusing the shit out of the AI and anyone who looks upon it.
> Build indoor fire chamber/secondary incinerator
> Build "Fun Time Room" a NOS Chamber that makes you giggle.
> Cool gases using space (This was before the cooler patch)
> Only takes a half hour to make the most bitchin Atmosia the station had ever seen
> Want to do more
> Tube slide time
> Walk around station, as people run like chicken with there heads cut off, slipping and doing various bull shit, but not I. Janitor asks what I am doing, tell him. He seems cool about it.
> Take Time. Perfection takes time
> Start at arrivals and re purpose lounge into "Tube slide access"
> Work my way around, finally making first stop at bridge/ center of station, where I make a tube slide station
> Work way further to the Maltese Falcon, for second stop.
> Finally, and somehow uninterrupted put final stop in Departure. Walk back to atmospherics, only took an hour and a half
> Chill out. Suddenly over radio "HOLY MOTHER OF HONK WE HAVE A TUBESLIDE FOREVER" From the clown.
>Suddenly everyone uses tubeslide until over the radio "JANITOR JUST LUBED UP THE TUBE SLIDE EXIT AND SPACED FIVE PEOPLE!"
> Chaos ensues, shuttle is called and I walk to it.
> Not a shit was given that day

>>23515021
>JANITOR JUST LUBED UP THE TUBE SLIDE EXIT AND SPACED FIVE PEOPLE
Egad, that was a fun round. Now I remember why the warp overtakes me whenever I see the Janitor.

>Be Vardan Larn, Cargo Monkey
>Rev round
>Make circular saw, wear weld mask at all times
>Me and QM lock down Cargo, allowing no entry by anyone.
>Revs flush themselves in through disposals, attempt flashing
>lolnope
>Beat revs to death, strip 'em and space 'em
>Sec barges in, stuns us all
>Takes us to brig for murder
>Later tell us we will be killed because of we're suspected revs
>Tell shitcurity to just implant us
>Can't because they're out of implants
>Refuse to let us go back to cargo under escort to order some
>Get strapped to chair for final beatdown by HoS
>Revs bust in, kill HoS, save me and QM
>Viva la Revolution!

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>>23514980
Friendly Antag = best antag.
> Be robotocist
> TATER!
> Goal is to steal a carded AI.
> I laugh and wait.
> I go gab intellicard from tech storage.
> Build ripley's Gygaxes, cyborgs, hell I build an ED 209 for security
> Other taters causing a huge fucking mess
> Whatevs. Build autolathe because R&D and I are homies like that. Hack it and put it right in the open for everybody to use.
> People saying AI is also traitor, but AI seems pretty bro.
> Shuttle is called. Wait a little while, until about 1 minute till AI is bitching how he won't get to go.
> "Hey Ian (AI) want to come with us to Centcom?"
> "FUCK YES"
> Go card ian
> take him to pod
> Deploy Syndie Balloon.
> Other guy in pod says "Holy shit. You were syndie the hole time?"
> "Yeah."
> Suddenly another Balloon "Me too, didn't kill a single person, just took some plasma."
> Tater pod arrives.
>Not a single fuck was had

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>>23515108
> Be head rev, and can see other head rev
> whisper "The revolution shall be silent and not televised."
> "Good plan"
> go about flashing people in quiet spaces and never doing it alone
> Someone over the radio complains about lings in maintenance
> Security gets uppity
> Take out Chief Engineer with Axe, space the body
> Someone else magically spaces the HoS
> Roboticist is other Head, over-rides Janiborg laws de-integrates it from AI.
> Janiborg spaces wandering captain
>Still thinks it's lings
> Steal Free Form Law card
> Imput laws into AI to slowly and methodically take the heads naked to the mining station, and pretend that there are lings and traitors abound
> Twenty minutes later the last head is dead

>Arrive late
>Blood all ove arrivals, radio chat is dead
>AI tells me to run, Dante has a cloak and has killed everything
>Book it to sec
>Get armor, taser, and a flash
>Avoid where AI says Dante is
>Go to medbay for med supplies
>Firearm deploys in lobby
>Start getting shot by lasers
>Spam flash
>Overload Dante's cloak
>Tase him
>Beat him to death
>Call shuttle, card AI, go home
>Get +15 karma form one round
Feels good.

>>23515021
>>23515101
>>23515295

Janitors and Janiborgs terrify the shit out of me because of this.

>>23515305
Yeah, I remember one round I was warden and suddenly alium life forms where in the station. Dante was in permabrig for some insanity ( I think he murdered Ian then pushed the clown into the garbage disposal, which was open into space.) I went to the armory, grabbed the best shit, opened dante's door and said "Aliums are on board. Go have some fun." Somehow I felt bad for the alium players. Then I realized that Dante had killed all the aliums in record time, and well he was now extremely well armed. Let's just say that the station has gone to hell faster before, but I almost shat myself when he came back, handed me the gear and said "Thanks" as the shuttle arrived.

>>23515305
Out robusted Dante? On /tg/? Are you the buerer?

>>23500320

Centration thing?

>Be tater RD
>Need to kill the detective
>Hatch a dastardly plan
>Build a small, dark room in spess with a chair, table, lamp, and surgery tools
>Drop telebeacon
>Return to station, Dante Smith ambushes me with an E-bow
>Detective appears from shadow, kills him and helps me up after taking a hit
>Offer to patch her up in surgery
>She agrees
>Put her under with sleeping gas
>Teleport us both to my magical realm
>Put on voice changer, set to unknown
>Wake her up
>Ask her where her payment is
>She's oblivious
>Wrong answer
>Stab her eye
>Continue torturing her until she dies, blood all over the floor, my clothes, and tools
>Go back to station
>Act like nothing happened
>Nobody questions me
>Stealth traitor wins again!

Brobot, he was bros with everyone.

>>23515380
Burer, Broba Fett, Kor Phaeron, Rebecca Sharpe, Dave Oneal, Uhangi

There are more robust people than Dante. He's quality, but not legendary

>>23515380
Nope, Kobe Goodman.
Dante wasn't too robust sans E-bows

>>23515552
I would go to say Burer isn't super robusto, I've taken him down before.

Being robust is more about preparing to fight than fighting itself.

>>23511263
here here. Of all the complaints made against Urist he always treated me fairly and square.

If a complaint was made, he checked it out. Truly they were my favourite admins. Never did play with Pink as an admin much. She (I think?) was fun to partner up with though.

>>23515607
I'd say this AND it's also a matter of being aware of your surroundings.

Never. Trust. Anyone.

>>23515552
>>23515607
>>23515564
Eh, I have taken out Burer and Uhangi before. Never went up against Broba, Rebecca or Dave. Kor I did. I died horribly.
>>23515614
Urist is pretty awesome, but one time he went into an infamously fell mood while we were mining. I had the good sense to run the fuck away.

How to make tubeslide like that atmos fellow was talking about? And to make stungloves, you just use wires
And gloves, then on battery right?

>>23515518
Ahh Torture. I made a special hell hole for someone after going exploring. I put on my red hat and space suit and proceeded to sing Greenskeeper's "The lotion" before beating them to near death then tossing them into space.

>>23515749
tubeslides are trade secret. Also long ones like that take time and effort. I told one guy before, first thing he did was turn all of maintenance into a god damned tube loop or a fun ride into space. The entire station was fucked as a result and he wasn't even tater
[spoilers] it's on the wiki how to make it [/spoilers]

>>23515552
wait, UHANGI is legendary?

I never felt old with these nostalgia threads, but goddamn.

>>23515850
yup, he is ow legendary. Just like vampire round. Or Highlander mode.

Thank you friend. Mos recommended job to make them?

>>23515913
To
>>23515827

>>23515909
unfamiliar with both of these. I was playing shortly after its inception with /tg/

I played non-stop for several months and then abruptly stopped. Its a bit fuzzy but I believe employment was involved. I also burned out on the 4+ hour rounds I was forced to endure only to watch my efforts go up in smoke.

>>23498656
RIP /tg/station

Where are you now, TLE? Are you watching us, even now, from the shadows of space? Mourning what your station has become?

I actually tried to get a hold of the old ovary station map from the devs. Unfortunately, the old power areas and such aren't saved, just the physical map. Quite a shame, I'd love to bring back that server.

>>23515925
Atmospheric Technician or Chief Engineer.

Chief Engineer is best because then nobody will question it.

>Playing pink, 10 person round
>Clown is named Nar-Sie
>As an assistant, challenge him to fisticuffs in fitness
>You feel a tiny prick, then a burning sensation
>Panic.jpg
>Eaten by ling clown
>Clown eats two other people undetected
>People begin to notice, HoS finds a body, assembles the remaining crew, the warden, barkerp, clown and him
>Search station, looking for clues scoob
>Split up, HoS with barkeep, Clown with warden
>Clown noms wardern
>When warden never replies, HoS assumes clown is the ling
>Power fails
>Miner returns from mining, oblivious to what is happening
>Nomed by clown, clown becomes him
>Clownminer asks HoS to rescue him from mining dock
>He does, gets nommed
>Clown becomes HoS
>Returns to sec and eats the barkeep
>Escapes alone
I love low population changling.

>Watching a friend play the game.
>He always plays Engineer or Chief Engineer.
>Watch an entire round as he plays.
>He sets up the solars, gets them running, charges all the SMES batteries all the way up, and powers the station.
>All just from solars.
>AI bitching and whining and demanding that sec arrest//detain/brutally murder him the whole way because he won't set up the singularity engine.
>Has to stop the other engineers who are trying to shut up the AI by setting the singularity engine up.
>Eventually just locks the console for the engine in secure storage and issues a station-wide announcement that the singularity engine is not necessary, because solars are supplying enough power for everything.
>AI still doesn't shut up, whining to sec about getting him removed from engineering.

Not one single fuck was given that entire round.

>>23516204
AI was out of line. So long as there was sufficient energy to keep the meat bags within her safe, your AI should have been unconcerned unless she had plans to release the singularity on the station and was bad at role-playing. AI is the hardest class to role-play as IMO.

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>>23516204
That's a good CE Right there. Let me tell you the time I was a bad one.
> Tater
> Objective: Steal Blueprints.
> You have got to be shitting me.
> Take blueprints put them in backpack.
> Set up power etc.
> Decide, fuck it, it's fun time.
> Inform the other heads of staff my wish to create a new wing of the station and redesign others, just to make the place more pimping.
> Other staff heads, especially the HoS concur.
> Go to HoP and get access to damn near every area to be pimped.
> HoS messages me to come to his office.
> I Oblige him
> He states first two tater code words in a whisper.
> I respond with the third
> Ask him what the dealio
> He has to kill the head of R&D and steal some magboots.
> I pass him mine.
> He wants to make it look like an accident, he thinks pimping out the permabrig would be the best way for it.
> Together the HoS, with my best engineer and Atmosia tech and three RCDs we create a maximum security super jail that goes into space and all around the station, centered in a giant arena like center thus giving the inmates something to do.
> Additionally reinforced hidden doors are all across the super jail.
> Various criminals are caught and brought to the super jail, and then we ask the R&D chief to bring in some metroid enzyme (No idea what they are now.) Inject him with enzyme
> Toss him in super jail with inmates, who are armed.
> HoS and I give up subtlety.
> Turn superjail into a roman style gladiator arena and round up non engineering/security people (Security and Engineering thought this was a cool plan.)
> Gladitorial games go on for about two hours until a fucking death squid is dispatched and kills our glorious fun. Die gloriously fighting side by side with best bro HoS.
>MFW I have +5 Karma

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Final Story:
>Late at night, low population. Decide it's time to fuck with everyone
> Change Name to Moleman Rodgers
> Pick Assistant.
> Before round even starts, I have one goal in mind. Unify station with grand glorious tunnel network: I will make a secret passage to every main room. No exceptions.
> Get Tater: Objective: Steal RCD.
> Gain Maintenance access.
> Run around station, making tunnels, nobody notices.
> Twenty minutes in the Captain arrives.
> Already built tunnel into his room.
> Still unaware
> Someone trolling kills random person, security goes a running.
> Go to Brig area. Create tunnel system while security isn't looking through interrogation room to one of the cells.
> A Voice in my head says "What exactly in the fuck are you doing?"
> "I am Moleman Rodgers, I make tunnels. It is my calling"
> Voice in head laughs, and says "Carry on"
> Finally Make Tunnel to Chemistry. My goal is complete.
> Dick around, go to Cargo, make RCD waltz out.
> Go decide to check on Brig tunnel.
> Walk into interrogation room.
> Braindead security.
> Walk past
> See timer at nothing at door still closed while person in there naked. Open secret door.
> Person freaks out. "Come with me if you want to live"
> Person does.
> Introduce person to tunnel system.
> Suddenly shit goes sour
>Fuzz over intercomm find out about tunnels.
> Sneak into teleporter room
> Get void suits
> Go to old soviet pirate radio station
> Me and friend annoy the rest of the station for the remaining two hours of play time by pretending to be disc jockeys and singing pop songs from the eighties as DJ Mike and the Moleman.
> Nobody can figure out where we are at. Nobody the entire time. It was Glorious.

>>23513092
Ah Nox station, one day I will learn how to make bombs to destroy that station.

>>23498656
fuck, I miss the old server...Simon Belmont here if anyone remembers. Haven't played in years now.